“Of course I couldn’t get out of this scot-free. I gave him everything, and now, he is going to screw me over some more.” I choked on air, my body unsure whether it wanted to dry heave or sob.
I was so stupid.
Lu shook her head, though her face was drawn. We both knew that I was screwed already. We didn’t need some test to tell us otherwise.
“You don’t know that.”
I knew my luck.
“It’s going to be negative,” said Lu as she squatted down on the olive-green rug in front of the tub.
Probably. Maybe.
“How do you know?” I asked.
“I’m trying to think positively,” she mumbled.
I raised my eyebrows at yet another turn of events. “For once in your life?”
Lu shrugged. “Figured one of us should right now.”
There was already too much bad energy flowing throughout the place—that was certain. I needed to open up the blinds and push open the sliding door to let fresh air in. But right now, I was here. Sitting and waiting.
“What about your goddess?” Lu asked after a moment.
“What about her?”
“I know you have been growing a relationship with Hecate this past year, right?”
I nodded, though I’d been distracted recently. Hecate, the goddess of justice and magic. Funny, how you needed something after you ignored it for a while. I needed a little justice. More than a little magic to somehow make this all right, yet I felt nothing.
“And she’s had no input on any of this recently?” Again, she looked around the apartment through the open bathroom door. “By how you talked about her, I would’ve thought she’d be a bit vocal after everything.”
I looked over at Lu, who had never been very close to any goddess but always respected mine. The thought of Hecate, however, after the past few days, made me even sadder than I already had been.
“I haven’t heard from her in a while. Not like how I normally do anyway. I don’t think she likes being wrong about certain things either,” I commented.
“Yeah, sounds like someone I know.”
Focusing on my hands clasped together, I put all my strength into not rolling my eyes.
“I’m just saying,” said Lu, “you always have us and her, even after all of this. The bonds were formed for a reason. They’ll be here whenever you need to lean one way or the other.”
“I know what you mean,” I said too harshly. I took a breath. “Thank you. For this and …”Everything.
Lu only gave a small nod, looking back down at her watch after another second.
“Time’s up,” she whispered. “You need to be the one who looks, so I don’t say something stupid either way.”
I sighed with another shake of my head at this whole scenario. The likelihood that I was pregnant was slim to none, and yet …
I couldn’t just get away with him leaving,I thought as I reached for the test, sliding it off the counter.As if it was all just a dream.
He couldn’t just get away like this.
Because when I thought of him, it didn’t feel like an ending, no matter how logical that was.
And yet we would go on as if we had never happened at all.
