Mum nodded. ‘And?’
I carefully folded the tissue to go back in the box. ‘When I split up with Andy after university, you told me that you and Dad split up for a while when you were younger…’
Mum picked up another box and unwrapped the contentsbefore answering. ‘I was about to do my nursing training and your dad had a joinery apprenticeship lined up so we’d be living two hours apart. Neither of us could afford cars and there weren’t the transport or communication links we have these days. There was parental pressure on both sides. It was all, “You’re too young, it’s too far, you’ll meet other people” and we started believing what they said. So we split up.’
‘Did you regret it?’
‘Of course. We both tried to be mature about it but being apart from your dad was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. We both knew we’d found The One and it didn’t matter to us that we’d met when we were fifteen.’
‘How long were you apart?’
‘About three months. I finished my studies for Christmas, bumped into your dad that evening, and we knew we had to be together.’ She picked up another box to unpack. ‘I take it this is about Andy?’
I nodded. ‘How did you know that Dad was The One?’
Mum put the box down on the shelf and turned to fully face me. ‘Because I couldn’t imagine my life without him. Being apart was unbearable and, when I thought of a future without him, I wanted to curl up and die. I knew we were going to have a few tough years living so far apart but that was short-term. I knew we’d have a lifetime together afterwards. When I thought of the future, all I could picture was your dad and I growing old together.’
‘Thanks, Mum.’ I picked up another box and opened the lid then stopped. ‘The problem I have is that Icanimagine growing old with Nick although I think I’ve blown my chances. But I don’t know if I can imagine it with Andy anymore.’
‘Then you have a tough decision to make. Come here.’ She put her arms round me and held me tightly. ‘Like I said on Christmas Day, don’t be rushed into making a decision just because he’s heading back to London. If he really loves you… and, let’s face it, he’d be mad not to, he’ll wait.’
‘What if I want to get some closure and make the decision tonight?’
‘I say do it. But I suggest you think back to the last major life-changing decision you had to make. How did you decide between London and here?’
I stared at the columns of Post-it notes stuck to the wardrobe in the spare bedroom at Seashell Cottage. A large sky blue rectangular Post-it note posed my dilemma:SHOULD I TRY AGAIN WITH ANDY?Beneath it was a column of ‘for’ arguments on mint green square notes and ‘against’ on pale pink; the closest colours I could find to replicate stop and go lights.
FOR
Used to be perfect
Loved him for years
Always thought meant to be
We’ve had fun
He’s gorgeous
He’s rich
He wants to marry me – I think
He’s called Steven
AGAINST
He broke my heart
Is it love… or nostalgia?
Clare’s comments: why now?
Will the fun last?
Looks & £ – so what?
Mum: grow old together?
