I swore I would never feed on a human. There are real risks. He could get seriously hurt, even killed. And he expects me to use the most evil of my incubus powers on him at the same time. To rob him of his free will while I have sex with him.
The thought makes me scowl so hard, my eyebrows actually hurt. In response, Rafa reaches out and squeezes my shoulder—bicep bulging, jaw square—and meets my eyes with a reassuring smile. His grip is solid, and it sends a thrum of warmth straight into my chest. There’s so much caring in his expression, I can’t help but be a bit dazzled, and the pinched muscles of my face relax. He really does look like the handsome lead of a Hollywood romance.
Just a boy standing in front of another boy, asking him to devour his soul.
And I’m agreeing to it. Which means we’re both about to find out exactly how much of a monster I really am.
16
“So…what exactly do we need to do for you to feed?”
Rafa’s tone is calm, casual even. As if he’s asking about the weather. As if we aren’t about to have hot, potentially homicidal, demonic sex. One of my ratty towels barely hangs around his waist, while he uses another to scrub the wet locks on the back of his head. He just finished a long shower, even shaved, and he’s standing in the doorway of my bedroom. It’s a little before seven, so we have over an hour before I should even show up at the Benevolent Society. But the pressure of the limited time window still bears down on me.
I shift my weight from bare foot to bare foot on the rough carpet and nervously tap the tips of my index fingers in front of my tummy.
“I think it can be pretty much anything. As long as it’s together.” I feel a blush rising to my cheeks. “And we, uh, both come.”
He smirks at my little-boy embarrassment with the sex talk. He clearly has a lot more experience than I do. And all his bruises from the Benevolent Society have faded to near invisible, so he must have accelerated healing. Just another sign of how strong he is. But if I look closer, there’s fear in his eyes, tension just behind the bright flecks of gold over warm brown and green. He’s trying to hide it from me, but even though what we’re about to do was his idea, that doesn’t mean it’s not terrifying. We’re both taking a hell of a risk.
He leans his shoulder against the edge of the doorway and takes me in from top to bottom. A spark of naughtiness seems to overcome his nerves.
“Damn. You reallyarecute.”
I stand next to my bed in a black T-shirt and loose white boxers—my thick hairless legs, arms, and feet the only skin on display. But his expression is so thirsty, I feel completely naked in front of him. I notice his own package plumping under the terrycloth around his waist, and my heart starts to beat faster.
He detaches from the doorway to saunter over, his walk sensual, like a big cat. He flicks the towel he was using for his hair down onto the far side of the bed. It’s like something from a porn video.
That towel around his waist is all he’s wearing now, so this is also my first view of his sculpted pecs, chiseled six-pack, and perfectly manscaped treasure trail of jet black hair. (I mean, I think it’s manscaped. There’s a good chance he was just born to look like a classic centerfold.) There’s no denying this is hot. What’s happening right now would be anyone’s fantasy.
I’m scared, too, though. About hurting him. But also for myself.
Keen eagerness swells in my chest at the sight of this beautiful, vulnerable man, but it’s not just arousal. It’s a ravenous yearning, a bone-deep need to have him, to make him mine. It’s myhunger, flaring strong—and it doesn’t feel as alien as before. Less like some vicious creature living inside and more… likeme. Maybe a darker part, even a younger part, but after using my powers, after feeding on Collin, the line between who I thought I was and my incubus nature is becoming a lot more blurred.
And now that I’m going to give it what it wants, will I really know when to stop?
Rafa closes in to stand just in front of me, near enough to feel his body heat. Since he’s a full head taller, I have to tilt up my chin. His saucy grin makes it clear that he’s the experienced one here. The confident one. Both true things, but it feels like he’s playing them up for my benefit.
“I want you to know we can do whatever you want, Alvin. Because of what you are, there’s no risk of disease, so it’d be cool if you came inside me. Preferably in my ass. But it could be my mouth.”
The direct sex talk sends my blush fully up into my hairline—which might have been the point—but I keep eye contact. Maybe I am innocent in some ways, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have full responsibility here.
He continues, “Usually, I share a whole list of limits, but I totally trust you.” He winks. “I don’t think you’re the type to deliberately break anything or leave permanent marks.”
The gold in his eye twinkles in the light of my nightstand lamp, like the thought of me hurting him is laughable.
But it’s not.
I reach out and grip his forearm. The thick arm hair is softer than I expect it to be.
“Rafa, I’m going to do everything I can to take care of you. Ipromise.” I push so much meaning into those words, they press inside my chest toward him. I will them to be stronger than my hunger.
He glances down at my hand, and the confident, in-charge expression falters a bit and becomes more thoughtful. Younger. He takes a full breath, and I can hear the vulnerability in his voice.
“I believe you, Alvin,” he says simply, glancing down at my hand. “I know you will.”
We stand there a moment, and it suddenly feels very real, very raw between us. He’s no longer some guy from a hot porn scene or the big hero trying to make me feel everything’s okay. Instead, he just seems very human, veryRafa.
He bites his lower lip. “Look. I’ve been thinking. There isonething I want to ask for.”
