“Don’t forget your cat.”
The restof the day passed in a blur. She trusted Kit when she said that the preparations for leaving were being taken care of, but Elyria needed to stay busy. So, she went about the palace, never stopping long enough for more than a few words of conversation here and there, always in motion.
She checked on supplies, ensuring enough dried rations had been set aside for the trip. She visited the stables. She went to see if Kymber needed help packing up Elyria’s things. She would be traveling light but didn’t want to leave anything important behind. Who knew when she would be back? If she ever would be?
Elyria wrapped her arms around herself, blankets twisting around her legs as she curled up on her side, ignoring the way Sid stirred lazily on the bed next to her. From the moment Elyria had hauled the cat out of Kit’s room, Sid had been a right nuisance. Elyria wasn’t even sure why she’d bothered. As soon as they’d crossed the threshold, Siddisappeared in a poof of shadowy smoke.
The shadowcat seemed incredibly content to come and go as she pleased, reappearing at such wildly inopportune moments—the instant Elyria stepped into the bathing chamber seemed to be a particular favorite—that Elyria couldn’t help but think she was doing it on purpose. She’d caught multiple instances of the shadowcat sneering at her, as though Sid was highly displeased with her for the simple act of existing.
Elyria had a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with the knight that Sid had been so clearly enamored with from the moment she sparked to life.
The moonlight beaming through the window mixed with the shadows curling off Sid’s sleeping form, creating a smokey mist that seemed a physical manifestation of the fog clouding Elyria’s mind.
Every thought she had looped back to Cedric. To the broken pieces of something precious she might’ve left lying between them when she ran away. Had she ruined it? Whatever this was?
She pressed her cheek into her pillow, watching the final embers fading in the fireplace.Is that what we are too?she thought. A flash in the dark. A bright burn snuffed out before it ever had the chance to catch.
She should just let it be. Let him go. Let this thread between her and Cedric fray under the strain of distance and duty. They still had their roles to play, their own missions ahead of them. He would look for the crown. She would finally serve Varyth Malchior the justice he deserved. Neither of them needed the other to accomplish their goal...for now, at least.IfCedric found the other half, andifElyria was able to locate Malchior and reclaim the first piece, they would deal with each other later, when it came time to claim the crown in earnest.
When it came time to close the Chasms, for Elyria to fulfill her goal.
But at this juncture, those both felt like rather bigifs, so wouldn’t it be better for them just to part ways?
It would be cleaner that way. Smarter.
Safer.
But—
But what if I can’t let it go? What if we go our separate ways and I still can’t stop thinking of him?
What if this is our final chance?
The thought cut sharper than any dagger, and suddenly, Elyria regretted her purposeful avoidance of the knight. She was very much done with living under a cloud ofwhat-ifs.
She hated the idea of him thinking she regretted it.
She hated the idea of regretting at all.
Her decision solidified in Elyria’s chest as she tossed the blankets aside, Sid releasing a pitiful mewl as one landed atop her.
“You stay here,” she warned the shadowcat.
Sid poked her head out from underneath the blanket, offered Elyria an irritated hiss, then padded around in a circle, curled up, and promptly fell back asleep.
Elyria watched the shadows emanating from the cat swirl in slow, lazy patterns. Like they, too, were dozing.
For Elyria, sleep could wait.
This could not.
Her own shadows pooled at her feet as she swung her legs over the side of her bed. She tugged the hem of her nightdress down and smoothed her loose hair, tucking it behind her ears.
And then she stepped into the dark.
27
GOODBYE
