The tolling of a bell dismissed the council members, each one filing out slowly. I blocked out their words, not particularly caring what anyone thought of this ludicrous plan Luka and my father had colluded on.
Matthew, Luka, my father, and myself were the only ones who remained in the council room. Even the staff scrambled out, sensing the rising tension with each passing moment. Matthew squeezed my hand, and I had the sense to unclench my aching jaw. Not that it mattered, because this conversation was sure to leave me with just as much frustration as before.
My father refused to look at me, but I knew I could make Luka squirm. All it took was a single glance. “You knew?” I asked, slamming my fist on the table. A burned print was left behind in its wake. The smell of charred wood filled the air between us. “You fucking knew, and you saidnothing?
Luka stared at me, his softened eyes pleading with me to listen. “Eva, please let me explain—”
“Explain what,exactly? Why you chose to ambush me with this declaration instead of making me aware of the situation beforehand? Or how you made a decision that would changemy lifewithout thinking about what I want? What I think is best?” My voice rose and rose until the sound of my shouts echoed off the walls and surrounded us. I was lost in my anger, of coming to terms with something I knew I should be rejoicing and yet did not want at the same time.
My father and Luka both flinched, my barbed words embedded under their skin as I intended. There was no way to stop my world from spinning out of my control. How could they do this? To abdicate the throne now showed weakness, not strength. We needed to show a united front now more than ever.
I shook my head. “You havebothlost your minds. A transition of power only shows a kingdom divided and a monarch untested. We will be viewed as an easy target. How can you not see that?” Matthew moved behind me, placing his hand on my shoulder once more, but I shrugged it off before I turned to him. “You see my point, do you not?”
My father leaned forward, reaching for my hands before I pulled away. “Eva, my love, I beg you to open your mind and see that regardless of the facts you presented, this is theonlyway. You are a leader, natural born and taught. It is in your blood, your veins.” My father reached out for me again, his eyes begging me to understand. “After losing your mother and losing your sister, I am unfit to rule.”
I scoffed, rising from my seat to stride to the window. There were no hinges to open it, but I desperately needed air. I always knew I would take the throne, but not now.
Not like this.
I turned back and faced them. “That is a godsdamned lie, and you know it. You are more fit than anyone.”
“It is not!” My father boomed, rising to his feet. “Every word out of Alistair’s mouth yesterday was true, and I should have passed the crown onto you long ago.”
“Alistair is a traitorous piece of trash—” I began, but my father slammed his fist onto the table exactly where mine had been moments ago.
“That he may be, but he spoke the truth. I put you in danger. I put the kingdom in danger. For fuck’s sake, Eva, I did not even know you were being tortured under our own roof! My own daughter…” His hand flew to his mouth. Ruddy cheeks grew rosier, more flustered, and sparks of white light flashed in his eyes. “Gods, it makes me sick to think about what happened, and what could have happened had Matthew not stepped in.”
Looking around, I saw that Luka and Matthew had stepped away from the table, both conversing with one another in hushed tones. “Will no one agree with me that this is a terrible idea? That it will show others we are weak?” I looked back at my father. “I am begging you to reconsider. Do not do this, I am not ready. I cannot control the demons in my mind.Please, father.”
He wiped his eyes and took a deep breath before meeting my stare. “This is the end of the discussion, Eva. The events have been set in motion, and by the end of the day, you will be queen.” He stood and fled from the room, no excuses or apologies uttered from his lips.
I could not fathom how he could do this, how he thought it was right.
Matthew approached me, running his hand along my back. As I stared out at my kingdom, my heart felt as if it were breaking in two. “I cannot do this,” I said, turning to Matthew. “I cannot—”
“You can, darling. You can,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to my shoulder.
“No, you do not understand—no one does. We have only just gotten back. I do not have my powers under control, nor myself. If my father believes he is unfit to rule, then what am I? How am I any different?” I wiped away a tear sliding down my face. “He says it is because of the loss of my mother and sister, but does he not realize that I lost them as well? How is his loss greater than mine when I was the one who held them as they took their final breath?”
As the question left my lips, I knew it was unfair to compare our pain. The way we loved those we lost was different, but it did not change the anger I felt at his unfair explanation.
Matthew guided me back to the table, where Luka at least had the decency to look ashamed for throwing me into the fire. This should have been a momentous day. That’s the way it had been planned for as long as I could remember. We would look upon our people with smiles. Laughter and cheers of joy would sound through the air. But this felt wrong. Unnatural. There was no joy left. This was a day of sorrow, for it felt as if my father was simply giving up.
Luka sat down beside me. “I know this seems like too much, and if I didn’t agree with your father, then I would have spoken against it, but Eva…” He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “Your father has barely been holding on these past weeks. He is distracted and distant, drinking himself into a stupor every waking moment.”
I shook my head. “No. Not that cannot be true.”
Luka reached over and grabbed my father’s cup and set it in front of me. “Take a sip,” he said, gesturing. When I did not move, he spoke again. “Take a sip and tell me what you taste.”
Tentatively, I reached for the glass and brought it to my lips. The dark brown liquid was barely a cover for the stench of alcohol wafting from inside. And even though every instinct told me not to, I took a small sip.
The alcohol was so strong it burned deeply as it went down my throat. I retched, throwing it across the room. How had I never noticed this? I could not tell if I was more angry at him or myself. Even the voices in my head quieted down to a dull roar, listening for the answer.
“How long?” I asked, looking down at my hands. They had been shaking since my father stormed out.
Luka sighed. “Over the past weeks, it has increased to an unmanageable level,” he said, averting his gaze. “Your sister’s death was a catalyst that sent his problem spiraling, but I suspect he has used it to dull the ache since your mother passed.”
“I—I never knew,” I stammered. “I assumed it was the toll of the mating bond that had broken something in him.”
