“We really do. I wouldn’t have my family without it.” She gives me a goofy smile and tucks her long hair behind her ear. “So tell me about school. Mom says you’re halfway done now.”
My stomach bottoms out. Just the mention of the time I have left or the idea of returning to that campus sends me into a nervous spiral. Every day I draw closer to the end of my trip, the gut-tightening anxiety seems to get worse. If I get the internship to work with the youth program, at least I’ll be transferred to a different teacher for clinicals. Kayla doesn’t have anything to do with the Youth Center.
But I won’t hear back on that until January.
“School is the same.”
“How is Bekah?”
“Happy. Peter understands her, even though they’re so different, and he’s willing to help with herSeven Bridesaudition. It feels like the real deal. I don’t know if I’m more relieved or grateful.”
“Is he another theater geek?”
“One of my professors, actually.”
Luna gasps, which makes me smile.
“He’s young,” I say. “It’s not gross. And they’re cute together. It’s a good thing for her, but they’re very different.”
“And you? No guys since Alex?”
I think of Gavin holding me last night and how badly I wanted to sink into the blank oblivion he offered me. It could be so easy to push everything in my head aside and let Gavin fill my mind instead. But that’s what I always do, isn’t it? Find a distraction. Enjoy the romance. Worry about my problems later.
The thing is, I don’t want to do that this time. Maybe in the beginning I wanted to use the bucket list to get school and Alex and Kayla out of my head, but it’s different now. Watching Gavin with his parents and feeling so helpless to make a change was beyond frustrating. I need todo something.Take actionable steps to fix my situation. Filling out the internship form was the first one, and it made me heady and powerful. If I’m approved, I won’t report directly to Kayla anymore. Things will actually change.
“So there is someone,” Luna says. “Does he live in Scotland and have a beard and wear a kilt?”
“What kilt?”
“I mean, heprobablyowns one. Have you asked?”
“Who are we talking about?” I ask.
“You aren’t fooling anyone.”
“Anyone?” I repeat, a little too loudly.
Luna dips her head side to side in thought as the car slows for a stop sign. “Okay, maybe just me. I know you best, so it could be less obvious to the others. I could see the way you two were looking at each other the minute we walked in that house. What happened over the snowstorm, and why did you feel like you couldn’t tell me right away?”
“Nothing.”
“Callie, it’sme.”
“I know, and I’m telling you the truth. So far, nothing has happened. I taught him to play Garbage, we visited his neighbors, talked a lot…that’s it.”
“No kissing?”
“None.” I could tell her about the electrically charged hug, but that feels private. I’ve never had a hug make my knees weak.
Luna’s eyes narrow as she tries to read my expression. She breathes out, pulling onto the highway. “That’s a shame.”
“You wanted me to fall in love and move to Scotland.” It’s a statement because I can see through her like a vase of ice water.
“It’s a lot closer than LA.”
“My program doesn’t transfer, Lu.”
“Well, it’s not like you’d move here tomorrow.”
