When her words soften with realization, he thinks maybe talking her out of this might not be so difficult after all, until he hears her next words.
“If you’re not ready yet, I get it. I shouldn’t be pushing like this. It’s too soon, you’ve just begun to settle in, and I’m asking you to see the person who…I don’t know what I was thinking. I can go alone. You don’t have to come. I’ll get it done.”
“No! Goddamit, Kara. You can’t just…” He trails off, sounding no better than the pompous ass at their door did, but this is different. This ishis Karatalking about risking her life in his name when he’s already standing right here in front of her.
The fire in her eyes tells him exactly how she survived what she had to do while he was gone. How she managed to take out so many men that Silas feared her. He has no doubt she can take care of herself, but she isn’t the only factor here. He ain’t leaving this up to chance.
“We don’t even know if Silas is with them,” he continues. “Could just be another outpost.”
“Then we get what information we can from them.”
“And if there are twenty of them and one of you? If it’s a trap?”
“That’s what this is? You think I can’t do it? I’m accurate up to a thousand yards, you know that. They have a sniper rifle in the armory here that I use.” She almost looks hurt, as if he’s questioning her abilities.
“I know better than anyone what you can do. Wouldn’t be standing here right now if you couldn’t.”
“Then I don’t understand what the problem is. Silas will never stop until someone stops him.”
He isn’t sure how to explain to her or even to himself. All he’s thought about, when he wasn’t thinking of her for the last six years, is how his enemy’s head needs to be separated from his body. Wade has imagined all the ways he would make his captor pay in explicit detail, letting it lull him to sleep some nights like a vicious bedtime story.
Now, he has so much more to lose if they fail.
“We take backup? More than just me and you?” he tries.
“Juliet won’t send anyone I’ve asked before. It’s not her fault. I know she wants to help, but she’s had her own struggles. The men at Paradise Falls are untrained, and I don’t think Luke would offer them again, anyway. Besides, since when are me and you not good enough?”
“That’s not fair.” He shakes his head. “Don’t do that.”
“Then tell me what you want because I don’t understand how we went from being on the same page to this far apart.”
I want to leave this all behind, take you out on the road and start fresh. Never think about Silas again.That’s what he wants to say, but could they ever truly relax knowing he’s out there?
“Can we talk about this later? Sleep on it? See how it looks tomorrow?”
“Yes. Of course.” She offers him a half-smile that feels fake.
He isn’t sure what the next step is, but the last thing he’ll do is agree to any plan that puts her in the path of an oncoming train.
Chapter 19
Kara’s on edge. Can’t sit still. Can’t think of anything except Silas. How she’ll pull his fingernails off with a pair of pliers and then take his eyes one by one before ending it with a bullet.
He doesn’t deserve a quick death. Kara isn’t a violent person despite everything she’s had to do. She finds no pleasure in torture, but some crimes are so horrific that the only way to pay penance is to suffer.
She assumed that Wade would need the closure of the kill. She’s more than willing to hand him the gun and stand back, but now she isn’t so sure. They aren’t on the same page anymore. In fact, she thinks they might be in different time zones and has no idea how that happened.
They made a plan back at the blue house to end Silas together, yet given that option, Wade is only pulling away. Fear of his torturer could be keeping him from embracing this, or maybe it’s fear for her,for them, that has him hesitant. It could be a huge mistake asking him to dive head first into this. Who is she to dictate when and how he should confront the man who hurt him? If it were reversed, she can’t imagine it would be simple.
He doesn’t want to talk about it, though, and so she forces herself to avoid the subject…for now.
“Walk the dog with me?” she asks, intent on getting him outside for some fresh air.
He agrees easily enough, eager to have something to do that doesn’t involve staring at each other in the kitchen. They use the leash Juliet brought with their lost puppy and head out into the neighborhood, braving the bright sun.
The dog’s idea of a walk is different from theirs. He takes a few steps only to stop and sniff a flower. Another three steps before licking the pavement. Four more and he’s distracted by a worm on the sidewalk.
“He ain’t that bright, is he?” Wade points to the puppy currently mesmerized by a butterfly.
