“No, I'm not,” she says in her icy tone, but she doesn’t elaborate.
“I think that’s why I was all on the defensive or maybe even the offensive in the meeting,” I clarify. “I saw being the lead on the pitch and campaign as a way to fill the coming days and weeks with more work rather than wallow in self-pity.” I jump a little when my phone starts vibrating in my jeans pocket. I pull it out and look at the name on the screen. I sigh as I put the phone back in my pocket unanswered. “It would also give me a good excuse to not answer my mother’s phone calls.”
Mina arches her eyebrow again and I decide I’m starting to quite like it. “Mummy issues?” she asks.
I give her a half-smile. “Like you wouldn’t believe. It’s her 70thbirthday this weekend. She’s having a huge party at her golf club – don’t laugh, I’m aware how white and middle-class this all sounds – and I finally told her a few days ago that Markus and I had split up. Now she is trying to get me to get back with him because ‘he’s the best thing that ever happened to me’ and ‘how dare I show up at her party dateless’ which I didn’t realise was such a crime but apparently at age thirty-four, I should be married off already like my brother was. My brother with his perfect husband, perfect job and perfectly timed nuptials.” I stop myself when I hear how bitter I sound.
“Hmm, that sounds familiar. In fact, I think I can beat it. Myyoungersister just got engaged. She’s twenty-six.”
“Ouch.”
“Yep, and it gets worse. Guess who my sister’s best friend is?”
“Royalty? MI5? Miss Piggie?” I guess.
Mina frowns at me. “Those are weirdly specific suggestions, but no. My ex.”
“The one you just broke up with?”
“Yep. Not that she cares about seeing me again. She’s already got herself a new girlfriend. Took her all of two weeks. I’m pretty sure that’s a world record for rebounding.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah, so now I have to go to my sister’s engagement party and see not only my younger sister fulfil all my parents’ dreams, but I have to do it while my ex snogs her new girlfriend in the corner or something. Oh, and of course we’re going to be bridesmaids together.”
“Okay, I think you win,” I say, laughing lightly as I cross my legs at the ankle, which makes me abruptly aware of how much more comfortable I am leaning on Mina’s desk now than I was ten minutes ago listening to my team’s small talk. “When is the engagement party?”
“Next weekend.”
“Ah, see now you have a whole week to find someone else to go with you. My mother’s party is tomorrow. I’m completely screwed,” I say and as I do the dust particles and fragile fragments of an idea start to spin around my mind.
“Oh, I would rather just not go,” Mina says with a sigh. “Although that would be a pretty shit thing to do. My sister has asked me to be Maid of Honour so I suppose it’s not veryhonourableof me to bail.”
“Wait,” I say and I hold my hands up again, but this time it’s to ensure I have her full attention. I even manage to keep my wrists firm and steady. “Why don’t we be each other’s date?”
Mina gives me her longest, slowest blink yet. “What?”
“Are you busy tomorrow night?”
She squints. “No, but—”
“Then please will you come with me to my mum’s birthday party?”
“Are you asking me out?” She dips her chin in disbelief.
“Sort of, yes,” I admit. “And you can ask me to be your date for your sister’s engagement party.”
I pause and wait for her to follow my lead. It really is a genius idea. My mother will hate that I show up to her party with a woman. But of course, she won’t be able to say anything about it because she does know I’m bisexual, even if she refers to it in the past tense. She’ll have to play along with me and keep up appearances because that’s truly all Mum cares about once we’re in a public setting.
“Let me go with you next weekend by way of apology for my behaviour today,” I add when Mina doesn’t say anything. “In fact, you don’t even need to return the favour and come with me tomorrow, although it would really piss my mum off and that’s almost worth paying for.”
“You will not be paying me,” Mina warns in a low voice.
My smile is instant and big, bunching up my cheeks again. “So, you’ll do it?”
“Wait, isn’t it a bit… inconsistent that you show up with… me?” She points a black-painted fingernail at her chest.
“Oh, because you’re a woman, well, technically no. I’m not gay, I’m bisexual,” I explain and I wait for a clap of thunder, a flash of lightning or at least Mina’s jaw to drop to the floor. But none of that happens. She doesn’t even look like she heard me.
