“He’s in the cottage. He said he needs space, but that might just mean from me. I’m sorry to leave you guys to deal with the pub and everything…” I trail off and wave my hand toward the cottage and the man I left there.
“It’s alright. You focus on Lennox tonight. We’ll see to Jameson,” Angus says with more kindness than I deserve.
A thought occurs to me and I grimace. “I, uh, left a mess in your kitchen. I made shortbread, but then Jamie got back and I didn’t have a chance to clean up. I’m so sorry, I—”
“I’ll take care of it,” Aileen says. “It’s good for me to have something to busy my hands with in the evening anyway so I’m not just sitting around twiddling my thumbs.” She chuckles.
“Thank you,” I say, pulling her into a hug. “I don’t deserve you. Either of you.” I swap out Aileen for Angus and hug him as well.
“We’re family, lass, you don’t have to deserve us or earn our love. It’s just there. And it always will be,” he says, and I let myself believe him.
Goodness, why are they so good to me?
“Ready, Mum?” Lennox says from behind them, backpack on his shoulder, wellies on his feet.
“Aye. Let’s go,” I say with as much normalcy as I can manage.
Tugging him in against my side, we wave back to Angus and Aileen, and with one last glance toward the cottage, I think I catch a flash of auburn hair in the window. My lips tug up at the corners and I turn to my son, ready to finally tell him about the man I loved all those years ago.
We get to the street and Lennox pulls away, looking down at his feet.
How much did he pick up on today in all the chaos? Did he hear more than he let on?
He startles me when he blurts, “I think I made Jamie mad, but I don’t know what I did.”
His eyes go wide when he looks up after his little exclamation and then he bites his lip, something I tend to do when I’m upset too.
“You didn’t make him mad, bud.” My chest constricts. He’s got such a good heart.
“Are you sure? We were having fun at the desk and then… well, I found out his name is Jameson—did you know that?—and I told him that was my middle name and then he just kind of stormed off… Did I do something wrong?”
Ah, so that was the catalyst for the implosion of my carefully laid lies.
I shake my head and stop Lennox, squatting down in front of him so we can look each other in the eyes. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I did. And Jamie isn’t mad at you, buddy. He’s mad at me.”
“Why?” His blond brows draw down on his face as he looks at me, confused.
“Because I lied to him… about something really important.” I have to swallow the lump growing in my throat before it chokes me.
Damn, this is hard.
“I thought we weren’t supposed to lie,” Lennox says with so much innocence and sweetness it makes me want to cry.
“We aren’t. And this is why. It only ever hurts people in the end. In this case, it hurt Jamie and—” I blow out a breath. “It hurt you too.”
“What do you mean?” Lennox’s gaze bounces around my face.
“I lied to you too, in a way.”
“You did? About what?”
I stand and grab his hand, wondering if he’ll still let me hold it after I tell him. I start walking again and he follows, looking up at me with so many questions in his eyes.
“About who Jamie is. To me. To you.”
I lead Lennox up the front steps of our cottage and sit us down on the porch swing so he’s tucked against my side.
“Jamie is your dad, Lennox.”
