Page 3 of Nothing to Tell

“No, it’s not that.”Her muddled thoughts didn’t want to form a line.“Maybe I… I thought I was going to spend my life with him… When I found out about the affair… it ripped my world apart.For him, it’s like nothing ever happened.And there he is, just there, back in my social life.If they’re here to stay, Damon’s going to be at the office.”And there was the nausea again.“He’ll be everywhere.How can I pretend nothing happened?He’s up there dancing with her… he used to dance with me, you know?It’s so normal.Like I imagined our whole past.”The stranger took a step in her direction, keeping his distance without a word.“Why do I feel like this?”she whispered, pressing her splayed fingers into her stomach again.

“You’re not over him,” the stranger said.

That explanation was too simple.She didn’t want Damon.Didn’t feel love or lust.No jealousy or envy.She just felt sick.

“When they came off the dance floor, heading in my direction, I ran.”While doing her best to disguise the haste.“Man, I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.I can’t pretend to be happy for them.I can’t.I’m in the same place, doing the same things I did when Damon and I were together.I can’t keep a man happy and he knows that.Charissa will look down her nose with pity.I don’t want to be pitied.They’ll take one look and know I’m a failure.I’m at my sister’s engagement party and I couldn’t even find myself a plus one… I’m pathetic.No wonder he left me.”

“Sounds like you’re throwing your own pity party.”

Thanks for the sympathy.Don’t sugarcoat it, will you?

“I don’t pity myself.I disgust myself.If I’d known they were coming I’d have made more of an effort to get a date.I do not want to be the pitied singleton.”The only singleton.“Again.If I had someone to dance with… someone to take my hand… let them watch me dance and laugh and be happy.”What a fantasy.Pathetic didn’t cover it.“If I had that distraction, I could be oblivious instead of drowning in humiliation.”

“You did nothing wrong.”

Ha, that was a joke.“Yeah?Damon’s been my father’s favorite for years.There’s only me and my sister; dad has no son to take the reins of his business.Damon was that man.I caught them cheating at my birthday party last year.My mother was with me and… she said it’s what men do.”

“She expected you to stay with him?”

“Is fidelity too much to ask?”Harper sighed.“My father expected us to patch it up… Davis Scott is never wrong.My father is used to giving orders and having them obeyed.When I refused to turn a blind eye and put up with the affair… Damon was already in line to set up the Australian partnership, but I was supposed to be the one to go with him.I found out about the affair and Charissa took my place… in every sense.”

“You did the right thing.If he didn’t make you happy—”

“I didn’t make him happy.”That was the embarrassment.“I didn’t go looking for a better offer.I didn’t have affairs to quench my un-slaked lust.”Her throat hurt.“I didn’t keep him happy in life.I didn’t keep him happy in bed, and both of them know that.Now I have to stand in front of them while none of us state that obvious fact.Will they be thinking it?I will.Does that sound like a fun way to spend an evening?”

The impromptu therapy session was helping.The stranger’s intrusion started as unwelcome, but talking it out provided some perspective.Kinda.She could do this.She’d have to psyche herself up to return to the party.She’d be missed eventually and if the partygoers made a big deal about her running away to hide, she’d be even more humiliated.

“Did he make you happy?This Damon guy?”

What did that have to do with anything?

Lifting her head, she wanted to decipher the stranger’s expression because his tone was so… knowing.Darkness liked to be infuriating.

“I hadn’t thought about it.I wasn’t happy.I wasn’t sad.I was… indifferent.”

“And you were going to spend your life with the man?”

He didn’t have to sound so incredulous about it.Grown-ups settled all the time.Love, like real love, the movie kind, yeah, she’d never seen evidence that actually existed.This stranger was a romantic… or an idiot.

“We had respect… or at least I thought we did.”The cheating thing sort of flew in the face of that.“Love is… an anomaly, it’s not as common as people make it out to be.The majority of us settle with respect, cohabitation.A partner.That’s what I thought Damon and I had before I found out about him and Charissa.”

“You were wrong about that, maybe you’re wrong about love too.”

Talk about missing the point.Her turmoil wasn’t related to a delusion about a prince sweeping her off her feet.Ha!Ridiculous!Hilarious!

All she wanted?To be left alone to live her life.Unfortunately, the people in her circle prioritized relationships above everything else.

Well, other than her father, he prioritized business.That was the one thing they had in common.Because, truly, what else was worth the time?

“I don’t care about love,” she said.

“You care about appearances.”

“It’s what I’ve been raised to consider.”

“How things look?”

“Instead of how things actually are?Yeah.”