“You took the money.”
He nodded. It seemed he could not bring himself to look at me.
“And the tiny house that you made with my father. That first one you carved together.”
Now he turned to me, surprised. “How did you—?”
“I was there. Later. I wanted Rei to help me find you.”
“So you saw her.”
I nodded.
“I didn’t kill her.”
“I know. I believe you. Of course I believe you.” I swallowed. “I was devastated when you left. Everything you just said... about feeling as though your world was ripped away from you, doubting everyone and everything... I felt that, too.”
“Oh, Merrow.”
I looked into his brown eyes and felt all the emotions of those years well within me. “You broke my heart.”
His face twisted. He put his arms around me. “I wish I could go back. I wish I’d known.”
For a moment, I felt myself sinking into his embrace. Though I longed to remain there, I pulled back. If Will stepped onto our bedroom’s balcony and looked down toward the beach, he would see us. I hated the thought of hurting him.
“Where did you go?” I asked.
“I hitchhiked north. I’d sleep in the woods and wake up and hope for another ride. I kept going until I found a farm that needed an extra hand.”
“And that’s where you’ve been for all this time?”
“Yes and no. After a few years, another farm up north—a school, actually—offered me a job.”
“A school?”
He nodded. “A farm school. They teach farming skills to people of all ages. They heard that I knew about dry farming and asked me to speak to their students. Next thing I knew, I was living there full-time, teaching in their program. I’ve snuck some whittling into the curriculum, too.”
“Amir. My dad would be so proud of you.”
He blinked, ducking his head. “I hope so.”
“I know so.” I was aware still of our arms, touching.
“I never spent Rei’s money, you know. Well, I spent some of it. Just at the beginning. But eventually I opened a bank account and the money has been sitting in it for years. I don’t know what to do with it now.”
I realized that he had never learned about Rei’s will. “A third of that money is yours. She gave her house to the Osha Conservation Fund, but she left all of her money to you, Bear, and me. In a way, you took the money from Bear and me, not from Rei.”
As Amir listened, I could see surprise and relief wash over him. I realized how heavily, and for how long, taking that money from Rei had weighed on him.
“You know, I visited Japan a few years ago,” he told me. “I took a cooking class there from a woman who spoke English with Rei’s voice.”
“Japan? How did you end up there?”
“The farm school has a cross-cultural mission. Teachers come from all over the world and travel all over the world.”
I was astonished. “Where else did you go?”
“Costa Rica. Ireland. France.”
