But I’ll never stop looking behind me.
He may have promised Ella he’d stop trying to changehispast, but he didn’t promise to stay out of the past altogether. When he told me he believed there was a reason we have these gifts, I’d rejected the thought. But lately, I’ve been thinking he was right.
Neurovida’s going to wish it wasn’tmeblessed with the special skill of traveling further back in time than my own life. Because I don’t need to change my past to get vengeance. Besides him, all my friends are dead. I never knew my family. I have no one left to lose. And when you have nothing left to lose, you haveeverythingto gain.
As soon as he’s ready, we’re going back to Neurovida’s beginning. Before we were Alphas. Before we were born.
And we’re going to burn Neurovida to the fucking ground.
40Mariella
“And can anyone remember which area of the brain is considered the ‘personality center’?” asks our lecturer, glancing around the quiet lecture hall.
Anna’s elbow digs into my ribs, but I’m already holding my hand high above my head.
“Miss Adams?” he says, gesturing to my raised hand. He knows me by name, as do the rest of the psychology faculty.
Hundreds of heads turn in my direction. My heart rate jumps, but I raise my chin. “The prefrontal cortex,” I say, loud enough for my voice to carry to the front of the hall.
“Correct,” the lecturer says, with an astute grin. “As always.” He turns toward the lectern and continues his presentation.
“Show-off,” Anna whispers into my ear. A wide, open smile blooms over my face. “I’m proud of you, nerd.”
“Thanks, Anna.”
We settle back in our seats, Anna’s attention returning to our lecturer, but I let my gaze wander past our friends and peers sitting immediately around us, and across the mass of students filling the hall. I pause on the empty chair in the third row from the front, thoughts consumed by the man who once sat there with golden hair and a mischievous grin.The man who, along with the woman sitting beside me, showed me how to live. How to fight. I twist the fabric of my sweater between my fingers. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of Liam… or how much I’m going to miss him.
“I still can’t believe you’re leaving me,” Anna complains for the fifth time since I started packing. She plonks down beside me on my bed, the motion ruffling the contents in my suitcase. “If anyone’s going to drop out, it should be me.”
I lower the dress I’m folding into my lap. “I’m not leavingyou, college just isn’t for me.” I don’t know what is, but unless I get out into the world and experience it now, I never will.
Since Liam, Rose and Silas left, something inside me has broken free. I willneveragain be the scared woman letting others call the shots in my life. Liam and Rose sacrificed too much of their lives trying to save mine, and it won’t be in vain. I may have lost my powers, but in doing so I’ve been given a clean slate. My life’s just beginning, and I won’t waste another second of it.
“Who are you, and what have you done with Mariella Adams?” Anna demands with a disbelieving grin.
“She’s still here, but I want to get out and see the world. Live a little. A lot.”
If the last few months have taught me anything, it’s how brief life is and, if mine were to be cut short, I’d want to have experienced as much of the world as I could prior to that moment. “It’s not too late for you to come with me, you know? My offer to pay stands.” The money I made selling my house could support us both for years. Apparently land close to Harvard is in high demand, even with a fire-ravagedhouse occupying it. I raise my brows and lean toward her. “Apparently, the clubs are amazing in Europe.”
Anna groans. “Isowant to come with you, but I can’t join the family business until I complete a degree, so if I drop out now, I’m on my own.” She gestures to the pile of neatly folded hand-me-downs I’m yet to return to her wardrobe. “You know, you’re welcome to take those.”
“Are you sure?” I run my hand over the cashmere cardigan on top of the pile.
“Of course. Something to remember me by.” She eyes my brown leather jacket. “When you get sick of that old thing.” She places the pile of clothes into my suitcase and my chest expands.
How can I ever repay everything she’s done for me? She’s boosted my confidence, showed me how to let loose and have fun. Most of all, she’s been a true friend. I reach out and yank her into my chest, drawing in the comforting scent of strawberry lip gloss, peonies and her sweet perfume. “I’ll miss you, Anna.”
She laughs, wrapping her arms around me. “You too, Ella. Make sure you sleep with plenty of hot European men for me. I still can’t believe you’re giving up studying to go traveling. I thought if anyone was going to become a clinical psychologist, it’d be you.”
“Yeah, well…” Liam’s words play in my mind. “There’s no fun in living if you know how everything’s going to turn out.”
41Mariella
Twelve months later
My limbs ache with fatigue, the muscles trembling for the past three hours. I draw in a sharp breath of fresh mountain air, laced with pine and snow. A sharp sting bites at my palm, and my clammy hand unfurls, releasing the plastic corners of the Polaroid digging into my skin. The only photo remaining from the mass of documents cleared from Silas’s office and ceded to Liam two years ago.
Some would call it fate that this particular photo was missed, wedged at the back of Silas’s filing cabinet between the drawer and its base. I trace a numb finger over my mother’s serene face. She sits beside me on a rock wall by the ocean, face turned to the side as if catching the photographer in mid-exposure. Her top’s risen with the movement, dark ink marking the sliver of exposed skin on her lower back. An unmistakable tattoo. The Mark of the Time Traveler. Why do I have no recollection of my mother having a tattoo?
