“You know to be safe, right?” Mom straightens on her stool and pins me in my place. “Birth control pills won’t protect you from STIs. You can’t trust a guy when he says he’s clean or a virgin.”
I press my lips together to hold back the bark of laughter at those guys claiming they’re virgins. “I’m not having sex, Mom.”
Yet. If they get their way…who am I kidding? If that horny little bitch inside me gets her way, we’ll be banging the fuck out of those guys. That thought doesn’t terrify me like it once did. I’m so fucked in the head.
But I still want to find a way out of it. I have to. It should be my choice who I fuck. Not some guys claiming me as the last virgin.
“You have to be prepared. You should start carrying condoms.” She stands. “I can go buy you some, so you have them. You can’t rely on the guy to always have one. I know too many girls who thought in the heat of the moment, one time wouldn’t hurt and ended up pregnant at our office.”
“I’m not going to get pregnant, Mom. I have a future. I need to get out of this town and go to college where no one will have heard of?—”
Fuck, I almost said the horsemen.
Her eyes narrow on me.
“Me. No one knows me.” Not my smoothest save, but good enough. “I can start fresh. Trust me, I’m not going to get a boyfriend my senior year and let him complicate my life. Next year I’m going away to college.”
Besides, I can’t get a boyfriend while the horsemen own me.
I probably won’t be a virgin by the time I go to college, but hey, how many girls are actually virgins in college? I don’t need to tell anyone about my first time with four guys. Yeah, that probably wouldn’t go over well with a future boyfriend.
Besides, I might not give them my virginity. Maybe I’ll just end up a technical virgin. I might get away without parting my legs, but I know at some point they’ll have me down on my knees. Jack’s cock pops into my mind, and the feel of all of them against me.
Not really hard to imagine doing things with these four. Not after making out with them.
“Protection.” Mom grabs her keys. “You need protection.”
“Mom, really—” My words fall on deaf ears as she shuts the door behind her. I shake my head, but she might not be wrong.
Those guys push all the right buttons. Fuck, I even liked it when Luke spanked me. How desperate must I be to want the very guys I avoided for years? I go into my room and get out my homework.
I let my hair down and change into a loose t-shirt and shorts. I set an alarm on my phone to let me know when the guys finish their practice and then turn on some music while I work on homework.
I almost start to feel normal when there’s a knock on my door. Like this is any other year. Focused on homework, getting good grades. Mom checking up on me.
“Harper?” Mom’s voice seems a little hesitant, and then I remember why. So much for normal.
I squeeze my eyes shut and say, “Come in.”
She’s carrying a Walgreen’s bag. “Now I know you think you don’t need these, but I’d rather you be safe than sorry. I got two sizes. It’s important to use the proper size of condom.”
She sets the bag on my bed, and I wonder how red my face can get before my head explodes.
“I know you don’t want to talk about sex with your mother, but know that you can. There are websites that can give you information on sizing. I’ll try to answer any questions as best I can. If you need an appointment with the doctor…” She trails off. Mom works with an OB-GYN.
“Really, Mom, I’m fine. I’ll keep the condoms just in case, but I really don’t plan on having sex anytime soon.” As long as I behave, they won’t have a reason to punish me. Luke even said they would take things slow for me.
Of course, that was before I rode him like a wanton hussy.
“Sex is a normal part of life. I don’t want you to feel ashamed because you want to have sex. It’s natural. I just want you to be safe when it happens.” Mom twists her hands together.
“You’re right. I’ll get right on that then,” I tease. “It looks like you got me enough for the entire football team. Twice. Goals, right?”
“Maybe just try one guy at first, okay?” She smiles and shakes her head. “Just be prepared. Our mind doesn’t always account for what our body wants.”
I can feel my cheeks heat again. Yeah, I’m quite familiar with my body and mind not being on the same page when it comes tothe guys. My mind shut down when they kissed me, but maybe that was because they were my first kisses.
I’m sure I’ll get used to them kissing me.
