“Miss Fern, what is it?” Alex’s sharp voice cut into her thoughts.
I want you, but I want Oxford more.
“I can help you win my sister’s heart. But you need to help me get accepted to Oxford.”
Chapter 9
AlaughburstfromAlex’s chest, sounding even more unhinged than he had a few moments before. “Why would I do that?”
Fern’s jaw clenched. “I saw you at the party and I know you desire my sister. She told me what happened on the terrace.” Alex's cheeks warmed. “She’s a bit shy, you see, and is nervous about being courted. You’re a nice man, Mr. Carroway, and she may not see it yet but you could make her happy.”
Shaking his head, Alex laughed without humor. “She made it very clear she has no interest in me.”
“She was unlike herself at the party,” Fern replied quickly, taking a step closer. “She felt more comfortable with you than she had with any gentleman before, and perhaps was a bit more…forgiving when you took liberties with her, and she had some remorse in the light of day.”
Remorse. Of course Rose would regret having kissed him. He could never offer Rose the life that she intended to have.
“I will help her see the value of your suit. She’s my twin, and no one knows Rose Waverly better than I do.” Fern’s eyes lit up in her pale face. “Rose told me she had a lovely evening with you and wants to see you again, she was simply nervous when you called.”
A flutter of hope stirred in his chest. He had given up on ever having Rose and now this strange girl was giving him another chance. But a concern pulled at the back of his mind.
“Why would you help me?” he asked, crossing his arms.
“I want to see my sister happy,” she said. “The gentlemen my father wants her to marry do not care about her as a person, they only see her as a conquest. You’re different.”
He scoffed and shook his head. “Why go through all this trouble for me? There must be other nice gentlemen pursuing her.”
Fern glanced away and took a deep breath as though steeling herself before turning back to face him. “Because I want to go to Oxford.”
He looked at her askance. “Then why don’t you just apply, like everyone else? I have no special access or influence,” he replied.
“Because it’s not that simple,” she retorted. “I want to study maths, like you.”
Alex’s eyes widened. “That’s—it’s impossible, no college has accepted a woman for maths, they are not even permitted to attend the lectures.”
“I know.” A flush rose in Fern’s cheeks as her eyes flashed. “It’s patently unfair. Women are allowed to study languages, and classics, and art. Why not maths?”
“But it’s—,” Alex stammered as he struggled to identify exactly why it was problematic. “They are not ladies, not like you.”
“What do you mean,ladies like me?”
Alex pursed his lips, searching for the correct words. “Your father is a peer, is he not?”
Fern waved her hand as though it were nothing. “A viscount, so minor, at best.”
Alex shook his head. “Spoken like someone who has never had to question their position in the world,” he said in a gravelly tone.
“I am constantly reminded that my position as a woman prohibits me from doing what I want in the world, whereas you have never been second-guessed because you are a man.”
He flinched as her point hit home. “I’ll give you that,” he acknowledged. “But why mathematics? Why not study poetry or art?”
“Because maths is the only thing I’m good at.” Fern scowled.
Alex sighed. “Does your father know of your wishes?”
She nodded, her eyes dropping. “He thinks it is ludicrous as well. And improper. But he doesn’t understand.” Fern looked up at Alex, and something about her eyes made his breath catch. Hazel, with hints of gold sparkling in the sun. So very much like her sister’s eyes, at least as he remembered them. The ground below him shifted, the strongest sense of déjà vu he had ever experienced. She must bear a striking resemblance to her sister, which could explain why he felt an unsettling pull toward her in the vulnerable moment.
“I have been a disappointment as a daughter and will likely never marry,” Fern said in a rush. When Alex raised an eyebrow at her comment, she replied, “I’m very odd, as you certainly know, and no one will want me. It does not bother me, in truth, more time to myself, but if I can’t be fulfilled as a wife or a mother, why can’t I pursue the one thing that makes me happy?”
