“Should we go inside?”
Drat. “No, I—it’s gotten so noisy in there. I enjoy having a place to speak more quietly with you. Perhaps I could borrow your jacket?”
James hesitated for a moment before he slid the black dinner jacket off his arms and draped it over her shoulders. She stepped closer to him until she could smell the sharp notes of his cologne blunted by cigarette smoke. “Thank you. You’re quite kind.”
His lips moved as though he were attempting to smile after taking a bite out of a lemon.
I am a seductive siren. “I was wondering, perhaps, if you were interested…”
The words died in her throat, and James raised one eyebrow expectantly.
I am a seductive siren!“In—in perhaps, if you were interested, of course, in maybe seeing me…”
Without my clothes on! Just say it!
He must have heard the words she was thinking, because anguish passed over his features. “Oh, I’m flattered, but, you see, I’m not—”
Her hands shot up between them, sloshing the rest of her champagne onto the terrace. “Say no more.” She sucked in a shuddering breath as humiliation, hot and no less devastating for its familiarity, washed over her. “There’s no need to worry. You’re not my first rejection.”
She wasn’t certain why she said the last part, but James’s expression softened. “This is no reflection on you. You’re lovely, I’m sure, but—”
“You needn’t justify yourself.” The burning in her eyes became too much, as though this latest refusal had finally pushed her over the edge, the last drop of water that broke the dam. A lone tear ran over her cheek, followed by another.
James looked even more horrified than when she’d almost-but-not-quite propositioned him. “Believe me, it’s not you, it’s me—”
“That’s a tired line—” she hiccuped through a fresh wave of tears, “—that men use to make women like me feel better. But it’s not true.”
He put his drink on the balustrade and tugged a handkerchief from his pocket. “Please stop crying. I mean it this time. It reallyisme.”
She blew into the soft linen, all attempts at seduction abandoned. “I’m giving up. I can’t even get a man to take me to bed, which is what I was offering, by the by.”
He cringed. “Oh, I—it’s still a no, I’m afraid.”
She whirled away and dropped her bottom onto the step, crossing her arms over her knees and dropping her head. “It’s hopeless.I’mhopeless. I can’t even get the biggest rake in Scotland to ravish me!” Her reaction was perhaps overdramatic, and assuredly not helpful, but it felt damnedgoodto lash out at a man who had rejected her, even if he had done so far more kindly than his predecessors. “I am doomed to be a-a-achaperoneto some distant relation, flirting with footmen and drinking my weight in sherry.”
James sat beside her and she lifted her head. “W-what are you doing?” she asked through gulping sobs.
“The biggest rake in Scotland?”
She hiccuped again and wiped her nose on his handkerchief. “That’s the rumor I heard.”
He chuckled. “It’s exaggerated, I promise. And you shouldn’t cry, especially over me.”
“Why is that?” She sniffed. “You seem kind, and you’re handsome, wealthy. You must have your choice of any woman you want.”
James propped his hands behind him and leaned back. “It’s not that simple. I’m not looking for a wife.”
“Of course not.” She rolled her eyes and gave a humorless laugh. “You’re sowing your wild oats. Isn’t that the expression?”
Now he chuckled. “Yes, but… it’s different for me than what you’re thinking. I won’t ever be looking for a wife, as I’d make a terrible husband.”
Something about the way he delivered the words landed differently than when men like the Lordlings or the other rascals in Town said them. “You’ll never look for a wife?”
He bit his lower lip and examined her face for a long moment. “A wife is not what I need for…” His mouth worked as he searched the heavens for the end of his sentence, but understanding dawned.
Oh. Oh.
“Oh,” she whispered.
