"You don't just leave the Navy, Amos."
"I've spoken to my Commanding Officer, and I'm getting a fast-tracked honorable discharge due to the circumstances."
"But are you sure that's what you want?" asks Dad.
I've turned this over in my mind all night. The Navy has been my life for a lot of years. My SEAL team is my second family. But my blood family needs me now. Jake's son needs me. Sometimes you've got to put blood first.
"Yes," I say confidently. "It's the right thing to do."
"But is it what you want, Amos?" says Mom. "I understand how you feel about this boy and wanting to help. But what do you know about children? You've been in the Navy for almost twenty years. You've not had the chance to be around children."
"I'll learn."
Mom looks doubtful, and Avery just shakes her head.
"No offense, brother, but I don't think you really understand what you're getting in for."
I shrug, trying not to let them see how their words make me doubt myself.
"It's not like he's a baby. I won't be dealing with diapers and midnight feedings. He's six years old; he'll be self-sufficient. All I need to do is provide a bed and food and clothes and drop him off at school. How hard can it be?"
My mom and dad share an amused look.
"Honey," says Mom. "Your heart's in the right place. But kids are hard at every age. Do you really think you can do this?"
This is not the reception I was expecting. They don't believe I can look after a child.
"Does no one believe I can raise this kid?"
I glare at my sister and my parents. They all look away, and Avery gives a little shrug.
"Great." I run a hand through my hair. "I can do it. I can raise Jake's kid. I've got the apartment. And you guys are not too far away. I just need to find another job."
My mom sighs. "Honey, I know you're trying to do something good. But think about it. Just think about it first."
"I have thought about it. My mind's made up. I've been to see Alana."
"And what did she say?"
I pause, looking away, not wanting to tell them Alana has the same doubts as they do.
But I'm a fucking Navy SEAL. I survived BUD/S, the hardest training program in the world. I can survive life with a six-year-old.
I straighten up and give my mom my best hard-ass look.
"I'm doing this, Mom. It's the best option for Jake's boy. You know it. Avery knows it. I know it. I'm doing it."
I stride out of the house with more confidence than I feel. My family doesn't believe I can raise this kid. But how hard can it be?
It's later that evening when I return home to my apartment. I chuck the keys on the kitchen counter, and they skid along the marble top.
I huff out a deep breath and scan my apartment. I bought it ten years ago when I grew too old to keep staying with my parents between deployments. It’s a small two-bedroom apartment with an open-plan kitchen and living area.
My gym equipment sits on a mat in front of the sliding door that leads to a small balcony. The only outside space I own, aside from the communal garden downstairs.
It's a bachelor’s pad to crash in when I'm back. Not a home to raise a boy in.
Aside from the gym gear, the only furniture in the living room is a two-seater couch and a coffee table, both in front of the wide screen TV. The walls are painted white, and the only thing hanging on them is a wall clock near the kitchen. I don't even have a plant to make this place look homey.
