“I was going to say"—Luka placed his fork on the plate, looking very serious—“I’m not someone—” He cut himself off with a frustrated noise. “Sorry, I am not used to being on someone’s mind, being considered, or dreamt about.”
“That’s a shame.” Reno meant it. “The person you are pleases me and surpasses the versions I had in my head of who you might be. I enjoy dreaming of you as you are now much better than pretending.”
Luka leaned back in the seat, letting his head fall against the back of the booth as he looked at the wood-beamed ceiling. He crossed his arms over his chest and didn’t say anything more.
Reno asked, “Does this upset you?”
“No," Luka was quick to say. He shook his head and hummed. “Not upset. Confused, but that's nothing new when it comes to you.”
“I’m sorry," Reno said, “I don’t mean to confuse; it kind of comes with being around me. My actions and thoughts can be hard to understand for others at times. Like, Sage not understanding why I lay on her floor with her rabbits chewing my hair while I talk about a man I only met once. To be fair, it is her fault for feeding me so much vodka.”
Luka huffed, a small smile breaking out over his expression.
“I did look for you.”
“Doubt.”
“I really did. Not very hard, but it’s why Sage called me a creep. I did go online and look for people with your name on the forums from time to time. It was a weird fixation, not in a scary way, I promise. Just in a wondering if you were still out there and happy way, or if you listened to my music anymore, or if you were interested in being a friend.”
“Afriend.” Luka rolled his eyes, his arms still crossed tightly over his chest.
“Yeah, I know.” Reno felt himself smile and he sipped from his drink. “Turns out I’m bad at trying to be your friend.”
“I’ll say.” Luka tilted his head to look at Reno and his heavy gaze set a chill down Reno’s spine.
“You’re so attractive," Reno blurted, then let out a small laugh when Luka glared at him again. “I never stayed online looking for you for long each time. Online can be scary, and digging for someone I don’t know on the internet feels really bad.”
“I’m sort of surprised you didn’t find me. I’ve been active in your fan base for over ten years.”
Reno shrugged. “Again, I didn’t try very hard. I try to stay away from it all.”
“Me too, now," Luka agreed and his arms uncrossed as he went for his drink. “Still, I had a few—” He cut himself off again and his nose wrinkled before stirring his straw in the melting ice. “Never mind.”
“Oh, no you don’t.” Reno poked him, and Luka swatted at him. “Say it.”
“I had some..." Luka groaned and looked at the ceiling again before admitting, “Some art that went viral a few years back and um, a lot of the official fan pages shared it. I’m kind of surprised you didn’t see it.”
“What art?” Reno sat up straighter and felt his heart rate kick up. “Can I see?”
“No way.” Luka laughed, then scrubbed a hand over his face. “I will die.”
“No, you won’t!” Reno went for his phone and pulled it out, ignoring the multiple texts from his friends and Kandi as he opened his social media accounts. “Where was it shared?”
“This was years ago. I’m not saying!” Luka watched in horror as Reno started to scroll down a fan page. “Stop it.”
Reno held his phone out of Luka’s reach when he tried to grab it, laughing at the way Luka flustered so beautifully.
“Reno, I will destroy you.”
“Please do," Reno said breathlessly, his phone over his head as Luka nearly crawled into his lap to get to it. “Ruin me.”
Luka slumped down into the seat with his eyes wide. “You.”
“Me.”
Luka rolled his eyes. “Ridiculous.”
“I think it’s fair if I tell you about getting drunk on my best friend’s floor and crying about not being able to find you that you show me your art.”
