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She smiled, falling in love with him completely at that moment.
Chapter 12
Sebastian felt stuck on the uncertainty and pain he’d seen in his wife’s eyes. How could she doubt his affections? Because you’ve been keeping a part of yourself from her. And now she felt as if he did not want her. What rubbish, with every breath in his body he ached for her, and not just to make love. Her gentle smiles had a way of making him feel seven feet tall. She was witty and compassionate and so damn sweet she made his teeth ache. She made his day brighter when she visited the office, and her dedication to helping him with his work without much care that it would be frowned upon by society filled him with admiration.
You craved....
The memory of her hoarse pain filled voice raked at him.
But it is for you I crave my sweet. And he would spend every day showing her that, and not the way she would expect. He desired her beyond sexual pleasures. Sebastian did hunger to be free with his urges with her, but he wanted her to see he loved her and not how damn good she made him feel between the sheets. They had a lifetime together, and he would slowly remove all the shyness and eventually love her in the wild and untamed desire she roused in him. He would be honest with her in every regard.
“Forgive me if I overstepped,” Percy said stiffly, from behind him.
"Why are you still here?" Sebastian had slugged him in the gut when he'd come back down from his wife's room. He'd left him doubled over in the library, entirely uncaring, for he'd realized Percy would have known Fanny was standing there and had deliberately injured her with his thoughtless remarks. Percy was now dressed but still looked a little green in his face.
“It took me a while to recover," came the wry reply. "I am truly sorry. I thought...I thought I was helping, but I should not have interfered. Will I see you at tomorrow's dinner?"
"I'll be taking my wife to Derbyshire this weekend. I never gave her a honeymoon." How silly of him. "I believe we'll be doing a spot of traveling
. Paris and Vienna, I think."
There was a long pause. “Don’t hide any side of yourself from her,” Percy said. “For so long you thought you were foolish to want a lady so far above us...you in everything. But I can see that she loves you, and you are just as captivated by her. I will apologize to Fanny most sincerely when I next see her and let her know I never meant it and that I only wanted to prod you both to act. I will see myself out."
Sebastian made no reply, and the soft footfall of his friend retreated. He poured another brandy in his glass and sat down upon a comfortable chair that had been set at the side of the room. He sipped his brandy, rolling the liquor around in his mouth to fully appreciate its quality. He had a lot to think about. Fanny had never told him she loved him. I love everything about you was not what he wanted from her. He wanted so much more. He smiled, recalling how she had silenced his declaration with passionate kisses. She hadn’t been ready to hear those words, and he found he wanted to hear them from her, quite desperately.
A rueful smile curved his lips, he was never the desperate sort. But in this too he would be patient. A knock sounded, and he turned around.
“Enter.”
His wife’s lady main bobbed a quick curtsy. “Lady Shaw has asked for you to attend her my lord?”
“Thank you, Mary,” he said finishing his brandy, before setting it down with a decisive clink atop his desk. He made from the library, down the hallway, and up the stairs. He knocked on her door once, open it, strolled inside, and faltered. His wife was not in her chamber. He glanced at the connecting door.
Then the soft smell of lavender floated on the air, and he knew his wife was behind him. He turned, and just like that he’d forgotten how to breathe. There his wife stood, evidently fresh from a bath, dressed in a flimsy dark blue silk banyan which clung alluringly to her damp curves, her glorious mane of blonde hair tumbling to her hips in wild disarray. She was a beguiling clash of innocence and provocative temptation.
Heat pulsated along his cock. “Fanny, I thought we were going for a ride,” he suggested hoarsely, for if he gave in to her at this point, he would surely send her running back to her Mayfair family home.
She took a deep, steady breath, then reached behind her, and twisted the key in the door, shutting them in. The key went into the pocket of her banyan. His heart roared because she was committed to her evident intention, and he had to rein in the dark lust that rushed through him. He sat on the edge of her bed, splayed his legs outward, silently willing her to come to him. Though he wanted to grab her into his arms and kiss her senseless for being so brave and loving, he remained seated. All of this had to be her decision, and if she changed her mind, he would understand. He’d always thought it impractical how sheltered ladies of the ton were kept about intimate relations, but now he understood how significant a step this was for her. Her trust and love for him humbled Sebastian, and he knew then with every part of him that she loved him as much as he adored her.
A smile lifted her lips and then she sauntered toward him, such innate sensuality in her movements his breath hitched, and blood rushed to his groin. She stepped between his splayed legs and met his gaze. Her eyes raged with such emotions, anxiety, embarrassment, and love. He gripped the edges of the mattress to prevent himself from reaching for her.
She leaned in and pressed a kiss to his lips. “I am falling in love with you, Sebastian. Please, let me rephrase. I am hopelessly in love with you.”
All his warnings to himself telling him to move slowly with his wife burned away like ashes in the wind at her earnest declaration. Desire swept through him.
Her lips curved. “I love—”
He kissed her, hotly and with a will he hadn't known he possessed gentled his mouth. "You must know that you own my heart. I love you, Fanny, desperately."
Her tongue darted out to moisten her rose-tinted lips. “You will have to help me, husband, I am in unchartered territory,” she teased, her breath fluttering against his lips.
He released his death grip on the edge of the bed and trailed his fingers along the line of her neck to the hollow of her shoulder. “It is daytime,” he said softly.
Amusement lit in her eyes. “I know.”
“I will devastate your sensibilities, my sweet. We can go slower. Light candles tonight and remove your gown. Then we will take it from here.”
There was a breathless pause. Their gaze collided, and his gut tightened. His cock hardened on a surge of need so painful his hands trembled against her cheek.
