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Chapter Twenty-Nine

If I hadn’t been so anxiety stricken, I would’ve stopped to consider what this would do to my marriage. As it was, I didn’t have the luxury of time, or contemplation for that matter. Marching as fast as I could in deep snow, I strained every muscle in my legs running back to the flat. The snow was still coming down, accumulating on the sidewalks, on the streets. Heavy snow, soaked with moisture and hard to move. I think it took everyone in the city by surprise.

Some primal instinct told me to prepare for the worst. I changed into jeans and layered my clothing. I slipped a small, and very sharp paring knife into the sturdy, high ankle winter boots I was wearing. I was a doctor after all. I knew where every vital artery was. All I needed was a small sharp instrument to end someone’s life––and possibly save my own. I hoped it wouldn’t come to that, however, my past had taught me never to discount anything.

I was leaving without a word to Sebastian. I could only imagine how he would feel when he found me missing. Any minute he would show up at the flat and go into full tilt panic. The melee of feelings that thought invoked was too much for me to bear.

After making sure the ring tone of my IPhone was on mute, I headed out. As soon as I ripped the front door open, my heart skipped a beat. Standing with his fist raised in the air, ready to knock, was Alek. Both of us stood staring at each other in shock for an undetermined amount of time.

No preamble. “What are you doing here?”

“I have to talk to you.”

“Not now, Alek!” I shouted, slamming the front door shut. My nerves were so frazzled it took me three tries to get the key in the lock and turn it.

“Did you get a picture too?”

My breath stalled. I whipped around and examined his handsome face. He looked…I don’t know, worried. The cloak of superiority and nonchalance he was never without was presently missing. “Emilia?” was all he said, all that needed to be said.

“Yes, I have to go. I have to be on the platform 3 by 6. That’s in twenty minutes. I’ll barely make it in time in this weather.” Walking right past him, I marched double time down the long hallway, headed for the stairs.

“I’m coming with you,” he said, keeping pace, his voice right behind me.

“No.”

“There’s no way I’m letting you go alone. Besides, they’re expecting me.”

I looked over my shoulder, sizing up his intentions. “Fine, but let me do the talking,” I fired back. He jerked in surprise. His brow furrowed at my delivery.

“You’ve changed.” This was no compliment. His tone reeked of disapproval.

“Yes. And I have you to thank for that.” Pushing the door of the building open, I stepped out onto the sidewalk with Alek right behind me.

“Vera?”

I never thought the sound of that voice could ever hurt, never fathomed that hearing my name on his lips could devastate me. And yet, I felt all those things and more. I turned slowly. Sebastian stood on the sidewalk, snow half way up his jeans covered calves. The night sky, glowing with the light from streetlamps reflecting off the still falling snowflakes, gave everything a romantic appeal when in reality a nightmare was unfolding.

He was dressed casually for our movie night, a grey cashmere beanie hanging right above his eyes––eyes that jumped back and forth from me, to Alek. Lips parted. Bewildered. He looked like I’d plunged a knife in his chest––like I had betrayed him.

“Let me do the talking,” I murmured to Alek in Albanian.

Shoring up my resolve, I took one step closer. A woman’s life depended on what happened next.

“Alex showed up. I’m going for a quick drink with him.”

“I thought…we had plans,” he croaked. He did nothing to hide the pain, the gapping wound in his heart. It nearly killed me to see him in such a state, but time was running out. I had to go at him hard and fast, leaving him no room to argue––otherwise, he’d never let me go.

“Change of plans,” I retorted. “Don’t make this difficult, Sebastian. I’m not in the mood for any of your crap. We’re only grabbing a glass of wine––I’ll call you when I’m done.” Somehow I managed to push all my love for him behind a closed door, my expression one of total indifference. I didn’t give him a chance to respond. Walking back to Alek, who had been patiently waiting and watching in the wings, I grabbed his upper arm and pulled him along, leaving Sebastian standing in snow––and confusion. But I couldn’t say for certain, because I never looked back.

The streets were mostly empty. I pulled the hood of my down puffer coat over my head. Eyes shifting furtively side to side, searching for danger, I probably looked like an inept criminal.

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