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I glance around the room and see the framed paper again. The center of my chest tugs. Looking at the framed diploma, reading my name in the center of the document, it’s just too much. Sean sees me glancing at it.
Gesturing, I say, “Thanks for this.”
It’s too little to say, I know that. But how do you thank someone for something like this? I would’ve gone on the rest of my life with no diploma, not knowing that I’d earned it or that I could even get it.
There are people that watch out for you, there are people that watch over you, and until this moment I thought they were gone. The night my parents died, I lost all that. I had no one watching out for me, no one watching over me.
Sometimes it seems like Sean wants to be that guy, while other times it seems like he wants to be a Ferro. I wish Sean would drop his guard long enough for me to see who he really is, long enough for him to see who he really is, because I don’t think he knows. I don’t think Sean sees the man that he’s become. He still thinks he’s the monster, the man that was scorned and mocked and ridiculed, the demon trapped in this godforsaken place. And I came along sprinting down Deer Park Avenue chasing my crap car, and his world changed.
Our worlds collided that night.
Sean turns his sapphire gaze my way. He says it like it’s nothing and everything at the same time. “You sold your soul for that diploma. I know how much it meant to you. It was the least I could do.” Sean reaches for the hem of his shirt and slips it over his head, tossing it onto his bed, before turning and offering me his hand.
I’m beyond shocked at the turn of events. I want to drop my guard but every time I’ve done it in the past, I got sucker-punched in the face. There are only so many more hits I can take before I become permanently ugly, inside and out.
I step toward him, uncertain. “And this bath of yours, is it part of the Barbie Dream House or are we going to fill a big ass box with water?”
Sean laughs out loud and grabs my wrist. Pulling me against his bare chest, he’s all smiles. “You shouldn’t have come.”
“You keep saying that.” I smile. It feels like I’m going to explode inside. When he first said those words I thought they were a warning that I should leave. I thought I was in danger, but I’m not—Sean is the one who is in danger as long as I’m around.
Sean answers, “Because it means you’re never going to get rid of me, and the crazy ass future you’ll have because of it. I’m worried and elated. It feels like I’m bursting with joy and being ripped apart with guilt. I should have rolled you out of the mansion, onto the doormat, and kicked the door shut.”
My eyes bug out. “That would have been pretty nasty, Sean Ferro. Rich people have some pretty crappy manners. It’s deplorable. What would your mother think?”
He smirks. “My mother taught me how to survive, and I’m going to teach you the same thing. But instead of being three steps ahead of you and leaving you in the dark, I’ll take you with me. Every step. Every second.”
Oh my God, he’s serious. Is this it? This is the moment I've been waiting for?
His jaw isn’t locked and his touch is light. I can see the conflict burning in his eyes, but he’s already decided.
I don’t know if I should die or dance. I’m still leery though, so much has happened. I still don’t trust him, not fully. The problem is that I want to. Coyly, I ask, “So what’s three steps from now?”
A wicked smile spreads across his lips. “You, naked, tied to the Tantra chair.”
“Dibs.”
“Dibs?” A curious expression slips across his face. “What is this, middle school? What are you calling dibs on?”
Grinning widely, I walk toward him. “Apparently our plans for the evening are going in the same direction, but on step three I planned on having you tied up on that chair. Dibs.” I move my mouth slowly, letting my lips hug the word. “I call dibs on the sex chair.”
Sean offers a crooked smirk and takes my hand, pulling me ahead, into another room. “Spray Start Car Girl, I knew you’d be awesome.” I follow him, laughing.
CHAPTER 6
I’m about to make some witty comeback when every word in my head is suddenly gone. “Holy shit!” We enter a side room, and from how dark it was inside I thought it was a pass-through or a closet, but it’s not. It’s Sean’s shower, bath, and bat cave all in one. The walls are black glass tile with accents of dark blue here and there. Black marble basins sit in front of an ornate antique mirror that has Tiffany lamps fixed to the mirrors.
Pointing, I jabber, “Are those real?”
Sean laughs. “Never ask a man if it’s real.”
“Uh, you’re never supposed to ask a girl if they are real.”
Sean smirks and then says, “Everything in here is real.”
“So you put multimillion dollar lamps in your bathroom. Okay.” I shrug like that’s normal. He has rubies in his book case, so what the hell do I know?
Sean ignores my snark and takes my wrist, pulling me around a curved wall. As soon as I see it, I gasp. A copper soaking tub sits alone in front of a wall, which is covered in tiny tiles of blue, gold, and purple. Water trickles down the tiles from a decorative scupper, flowing all the way down behind the tub. Gold and silver handles sit on a pedestal with a sprayer. On the side walls there are two iron sconces that are at least six feet tall, complete with candles and flickering flames.
Eyes wide, I gasp, “Oh my God. It’s girl porn!”
Sean laughs as I ditch him to run over and look at the tub more carefully. His deep voice booms behind me. “So, at least I know where I stand in the scheme of things.” He folds his arms over his toned chest.
Touching the cool copper tub, I look back at him. “Why do you have this? It’s as if you planned on using it every night of your life… because let’s face it, twenty year old Sean wasn’t into mind fucks and boxes. Was he?” I glance around, looking for a stack of crates.
Sean smirks, revealing that lickable dimple, and takes my face in his hands. “I made this thinking that I’d want to share it with someone special one day. I was the heir, this house would have been mine, so my suites were all over the top lavish.” Sean tips his head to the side, watchi
ng my reaction, drinking in my movements.
“Did you ever use it?” I’m tracing my fingers along the edge of the tub and staring at the waterwall, too afraid to look at him. I’m sure he used it. He had to use it.
“Yes, frequently.”
My stomach sinks and I turn slowly to look at him. He’s trying not to smile. I stand and walk over to him as the corner of my mouth tugs up and my stomach sinks. “So, were these bathing interludes solo?” Stupid question, but one can hope.
His smile stretches further. “Perhaps.” He looks down at me with those solid arms still pressed against his body.
My gaze flicks between his muscles and his eyes. “What’s it going to take to get details?”
“Tit for tat, Stanz. Tell me about your previous lovers and I’ll tell you about mine.” Sean leans against the wall and unfolds his arms revealing his sculpted bare chest. He seems amused, like this idea could be fun.
Blinking repetitively, I blurt out, “You just wanted to say tit.” I wink at him and then stand up and walk over to the waterwall, looking at each piece of cut glass. “Besides, I told you, you’re my first.”
Sean shakes his head. “But I wasn’t your only. I caught that one night when you were ranting. There was a rich guy and…?” His voice trails off, waiting for me to answer and fill in all the things that I don’t really want to say.
I glance back at Sean and decide to just tell him. “And that guy liked my tits, too. His family thought I was a gold digger and broke us up on the night of our prom.” I say it stoically, even though it still burns.
“They didn’t bother to tell me though, so I got dressed and waited. He never came. Well, he probably did come, but it wasn’t with me. We had plans to spend the weekend together at his family’s summer home out east. They had a house in South Hampton. After that whole episode I turned into a lesbian and swore off men forever.” I smile over my shoulder. Sean’s lips are parted like he believes the last part. I pick up a bar of soap and chuck it at him. It hits his shoulder and falls to the floor.
