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And then I held her.
I slid my legs behind Lilac. Snaking my free arm around her neck, I hugged her head to me, trapping her face at my shoulder.
She began to cough and didn’t stop.
My lungs felt like they were going to explode, but still I didn’t breathe.
Her body seized, hacking and hacking. She lost control.
I shoved her away, and her body thrashed backward. She fell to her knees.
I thought I might cough up a lung, but my body felt on fire. Hunched over, I ran to the water and dove in. I heard a splitsecond sizzle and it sickened me. The pool was black and impossibly deep. I kicked to the surface, fighting my instinctive alarm.
Pushing away panic, I focused on the warmth of the water. It soothed my charred back. I was burned badly, but the thick fabric of my uniform had offered some initial protection.
I swam to the edge. My stroke was more confident now. Pain sheared through me with every reach of my arms.
I am water that flows. I am Watcher.
Calm clarity settled over me. This was all a mind game. Strength, power, memory, fear—all can be controlled with the mind.
I pulled myself out. The smoke was clearing and I coughed shallowly, tucking my nose against my ar
m. “Time to finish this. ”
When I shook off the water, I realized that my braid had burned off. My hair hung unevenly at my shoulders, and my head was lighter. Large holes had burned through my top, and the cool cave air kissed my scorched back.
Lilac rose, wobbling on her feet. Her torch had gone out. The rage in her eyes told me she wasn’t done yet. She ran for my switchblade and plucked it from the ground.
Hands out, I assumed a defensive posture. “You’re like the creature in the horror movie who won’t die. ”
“You’re the one to die. ” Despite the chest-wracking cough that shook her, Lilac braced in a wide stance. Arms outspread, she held the knife in a loose attack position.
“You know, as much as I’m enjoying our little chat, it’s clear I’m not getting through to you. ” I squatted, pulling the four shuriken from my boots.
Imagining steadiness, I centered myself. Cool composure. I am roots in the earth. I am grounded.
I threw.
I’d aimed for an artery, but my star hit her shoulder. She glanced down, brushing it away like it was nothing. She strolled toward me, coughing only occasionally now. “They made me leave home, but I’ve got a new place now, and I’m not going anywhere. ”
I rejected the unsettling notion that Lilac might’ve wanted to find a new family as much as I did.
Edging away, I threw again, hitting her thigh. She didn’t notice. Just kept coming at me.
“This no-pain thing is really quite disturbing. ” I threw again and it missed her neck, pinging off the cave wall. I had one star left.
Her face twitched. “You’re so cute with your little stars. But I told you they’d do no good. You’re no good. ”
I backed away, but she tracked me, slowly circling through the cavern. She was bizarrely calm, her arms down at her sides, my switchblade gripped in her hand.
I threw my last star and it hit her knife arm. She didn’t seem to notice—it just stuck there, and she hadn’t even flinched.
Swiping a hand across my eyes, I glanced around for another weapon, though I knew I’d find none.
“Having trouble seeing?” Lilac stalked toward me. As her arms swung, the blood gushed from her wound, pooling in the cracks of her fingers. “Because I’m not. I’m used to the dark. My parents would shut me in the closet, you know. Because of Sunny’s lies. I had to use Daddy’s lighter to see. I heard her with them. I’d sit in the dark, listening to her lies, flicking that lighter until my thumb was numb. Until it burned. ”
My second star was still lodged in her thigh, and firelight twinkled off the steel. Her pants stuck to her leg, soaked with blood. But she just kept coming at me.
