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One of her hands gently moved to secure my hair. When she spoke, that taunting, mischievous girl was gone.
Her lips brushed my ear when she whispered, “What if I was made for you and you were made for me?”
A breath ripped from my lungs.
Fucking chaos.
“What if I leave and never come back, because I know you’re going to ruin your life with this list?”
My chest heaved as I sucked in breath after breath, but still I didn’t move. Couldn’t.
“You’ll never be able to find me if I don’t want you to.”
“Jessica, I . . .” I finally pulled back to look at her. “You don’t know what you’re saying. You don’t know what I lost. And . . . fuck.” I just met you.
The corner of her mouth lifted in a sad smile. Those ebony eyes were clear and pained, contradicting her next words. “Then it shouldn’t hurt to know that we’ll never find out.”
She tried to duck under my arm, but I quickly blocked her from leaving.
Let her go. Fucking let her go.
I knew I needed to. But I didn’t know how.
“Do you want to know why you’re really here, Kieran? It’s because you gave yourself a new assignment to help fill that emptiness inside,” she said, pressing her hand to my chest. “But you don’t need one. You just need to live. I told you, you’ve never seemed more alive than since she left. Don’t force yourself back into their mindless, murdering robot.”
“Jessica, you don’t understand.”
“I do,” she bit out. “Don’t you dare tell me I don’t understand what it feels like to lose something you’ve spent your entire life protecting.”
Her chest rose and fell in rough jerks as we stared at each other.
As I tried to figure out what she’d lost. Who.
Before I could ask, she spoke. Her voice was soft and shaky. “You say you don’t have time for anyone who isn’t me.” Leaning forward, she pressed her cheek to mine to whisper in my ear. “What if I won’t wait around for you to stop living and breathing for someone else?”
“What if I was made for you and you were made for me?”
“Then it shouldn’t hurt to know that we’ll never find out.”
Funny. It shouldn’t.
But it did.
I wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her tighter against me when she started to leave again.
Trailing my nose along her jaw, I lifted my mouth to hers. “Fucking chaos.”
Her lips twitched into a smile against the kiss.
“Nothing about you makes sense. Nothing about this does.”
I’d spent my life loving one girl. Yet within days, this girl came in and turned everything I knew upside down.
She made me want things I knew I shouldn’t.
She had me pushing boundaries I’d never considered touching with Lily.
She could make me forget.
