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There it is, that reminder that often comes along and itches against my spine. I take a deep gulp and my palms begin to shake. Talk about a guilty conscience.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Yeah, why?”

“Because you just grabbed my thigh really hard and your face just paled like a ghost.” I think quickly, attaching to the plane landing as my only valid excuse.

“Oh yeah, I just hate landing.” I wave my head dismissively. Gauging him to see if he took the lie. When he does, I say a quiet thank you, swallowing my guilt like stale bread, scratching my throat as it descends. I’ll tell him soon, I promise myself. If I go too long with this secret it will only get worse, like a scab you repeatedly pick until it scars you forever.

“Anyway, I think I might do that, you think I should?”

I just nod my response. He laughs beside me.

“You really do hate landing.” Leaning forward so his face is inches from mine, he continues. “Don’t worry, your big, strong man is here to protect you. Now give him those sweet fucking lips.” My mouth nudges into a smile as I lean in to meet him for a soft kiss. I missed him; I really missed Trey.

WATCHING THE WATER AND DOWNTOWN San Diego pass by the window, I smile to myself. It looks so beautiful up here from the bridge to Coronado Island. I’ve wanted to stay here for years, and now I finally get to. The light sound of Parachute’s, “She is Love” is playing in the background, the calm setting washing over me. The sun, the beach, and Trey’s deep voice singing along to the music feels cathartic. I look over at him, taking in his Ray-Bans and snapback hat, which he’s wearing backwards today. Trey in a hat is a rare treat. I keep my eyes on him, taking a mental picture of this moment.

I always thought Kings and Trey would do something with music, they both play different types of instruments, Kingston is amazing at guitar and drums, as is Trey, but his voice is my favorite. It could bring me to my knees; it’s deep with a gravelly texture. It sounds like sex feels. Rough and pleasurable.

“You excited to see the place?”

I nod excitedly, clapping my hands together. “Yes! I’ve been dying to come here. Lana and her family went here for vacation last year and she told me it was gorgeous.” She was right, the sun is high in the sky, causing the beach to glisten like millions of tiny diamonds. The reflection of the sun on the slow moving water, showcasing a beautiful glare to cast upon it. It’s breathtaking.

“Look at the water, I mean I just want to jump in it from here. I can’t wait to lie out in the warm sun with you.” I see him glance at me without moving his head, a sexy smirk tugging at his lips.

“I can’t wait to see you in a tiny bikini.” His hand on my thigh slides higher, and I wiggle in my seat.

“You’re bad.” He just nods, placing his hand back to its original spot on my leg. I love it when he teases me, but not as much as when he feeds my addiction. His teasing is my foreplay. He gets me hot and teetering on the edge and then when I’m good and ready he takes me in a way pleasure shouldn’t exist.

“I got a glimpse of the new bikini you packed. I also got an eyeful of your freshly waxed pussy, and I’m fucking starved.”

We turn down a street with beautiful mansion-style homes and beachside villas. It’s not enough to distract me from his last words though.

I’m hanging on his every word, praying for another. “You know how easy it’s going to be to slide that bikini bottom to the side and do what I please to that perfect slice of heaven?” I twitch more in my seat, pushing my knees together to help alleviate the pounding through my clit.

“Just saying, baby, those scraps of material are just little pieces covering pure damn sin.” We pull up to the house, and I’m glad because I need to get out of this car. It’s growing hot with tension. That and I want to get inside this house so he can bite…lick…and ohhh. Dang, he’s good. We haven’t touched in a long time, and I don’t think I could ever do what I did again. Pushing Trey away, so I wouldn’t have to face my secret head-on, wasn’t okay. I would hate for him to push me out again like he once did. So why did I think it was okay to do it to him? Practice what you preach, Shayla Donovan.

He laughs when I get out and make my way to the front door. Oblivious to my guilt, I must be getting better at hiding it. And that’s a problem. I don’t want to hide it from him. Trey’s not only my boyfriend, he’s also my best friend. Best friends don’t keep secrets—good ones at least.

I look around, taking in the colonial-styled home, distracting myself. The outside’s painted a gorgeous navy blue with white columns framing the giant front door. The windows are all accompanied with white shutters, giving you the feel of the old southern homes, but with beachfront views. There’s an array of plants and trees around the property. White and pink roses line the brick pathway to the front door.

Trey walks up behind me and kisses the back of my exposed neck; a warm shiver runs over my skin.

“Wait until you see the views from inside, the bedroom looks right out onto the beach.” Moving around me with our bags in his hand, he sets them down on the porch and enters in the code on the keypad I’m assuming he got from the owner. He opens the front door and immediately you’re welcomed with the stunning sight of floor to ceiling windows that look out onto the beautiful blue sparkling water.

Walking around, I see there is a sitting room with white walls and blue couches to the left and then a restroom to the right. Giddy with excitement, I walk down the hall where we’re met with an open floor that houses the kitchen, entertaining room, and dining room, all which have windows showing the Pacific Ocean. Don’t get me wrong, I love the city views I have back home but this, wow—I could get used to this.

“What do you think?” Trey looks to me, setting our bags down beside his feet as I take in all the white furniture and beautiful scenery in front of me.

“It’s perfect. We don’t get to see water from our apartment, only city.” I turn and walk over to him. Wrapping my arms around his waist. “This is different.” I kiss his chest, then lay my head against my favorite spot, which he branded as mine and mine only. He rubs his hands up and down my back, the touch welcomed.

“How about I take you upstairs? When you see the bed, babe, you’re gonna go nuts. We may never leave here.” Releasing me so he can grab our luggage, he guides us upstairs, leading the way.

“Holy shit…” I whisper in awe. He was right. The four-poster canopy bed is king-sized and the blankets look like a sea of clouds. Images of Park City come flooding back. The blankets match the ones in our hotel, the bed where I gave myself to Trey—what a memory to relive.

The windows bring in natural light from the door to the balcony, framed in sheer white curtains. The wind catches them, making them blow elegantly in the wind. I let him settle in and set out to explore on my own. First, I need to see the view in all its glory.

I step out of the glass doors and onto the balcony. Greeted first by the wind, it feels refreshing brushing against my face, the smell of salt and fresh air all around me. My whole body feels warm from the sun; I needed this vitamin D. Seattle is filled with more rainy days than sunny.

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