After our secondalmost kissin the hall last week, I was even more confused about what was going on between him and I.
Maybe Pia was right. For all I knew, I could be shipped off to Draemor or caught in the midst of a war any day now. It would really suck if I died before getting a chance to tell Sebastian how I felt.
Admitting my feelings to him used to seem unimaginable, but it was beginning to seem more crazy to live in denial of them. If I wanted to take back control of my life—whatever parts possible—I could start by telling him how I felt. When the time was right, of course.
Releasing a deep breath, I stretched my arms up and stood from my desk chair. I’d been sitting here for an hour, writing about all the bullshit that had been going on and my predictions about the prophecy, though none of them felt right.
I peered out the window in front of me, missing the view that my old room had. This one didn't show the ocean at all, just some trees left bare from the cold. I still hadn't fully processed all of the changes that had taken place lately. Instead, I avoided the thoughts when they swelled in my brain. Sometimes it was easier to just pretend everything was fine.
“Hey.”
A voice startled me, forcing my body to jump around and released a scream.
Pia stood in the middle of my room, her arms full of dresses. “Gods, Pia, what the hell?” I exclaimed, clutching a hand to my chest.
She threw the dresses down on my bed. “I knocked. You were too invested in your daydream about Seb to hear me.”
I rolled my eyes. “That’s not what I was doing.”
She waved me off. “Yeah, sure. Wipe the drool from your mouth and come look at these dresses.”
My duvet had been replaced by an array of taffeta andsilk. All colors of the rainbow, drenched in lace and glitter that shimmered in the light of the chandelier.
“Which one should I wear tonight?” she asked, and before I could even respond, she picked up a lilac ball gown by its hanger. “You’re right, this one will go well with my eyes.”
Glancing at the clock and realizing what time it was, I turned to my wardrobe. I hadn't looked through my gowns since the first gala. Swiping through the hangers, my fingertips paused on a deep blue gown, so dark that it would appear black in the evening light.
Pia unbuttoned the dress for me while I stripped to my undergarments. I must have gained some muscle tone since I started the academy, because the gown was pretty snug around my curves. I wriggled my hips into the fabric, then Pia helped me with the buttons again.
The dress was jaw-dropping with beaded straps that laid off the shoulder, revealing the sharp lines of my collar bones. The neckline dropped into a deep plunge that was more revealing than I was used to, but grew on me swiftly. The gown hugged my waistline, then dropped into a dripping flow of fabric, cut with a slit on each side that ran up to the middle of my thigh. The dress shimmered with glistening swirls of black and silver sequins.
“Nice ass,” Pia interrupted my admiration of the gown.
I snickered and turned my body to get a look at my behind. The back of the dress was completely open, the fabric not covering anything above the dimples on my back.
I felt beautiful, and for reasons I couldn't deny, I couldn't wait until Sebastian saw me.
Fighting back a smile, I combed through my hair, leaving it wavy aside from two small braids on the sides, connected in the back with a silver hair clip I borrowed from Pia. I covered my lips with a sparkling, pink gloss and finished off my look with a pair of silver heels.
“I'm not sure that I’m ready for this.” I shuddered abreath, trying to ignore the memory of the last time I wore a pretty dress.
Pia gave me a look of consolation. “I know the last gala didn't exactly go well, but try to have an open mind.”
“Easy for you to say.”
I let her apply a thin layer of hair glitter to my scalp and cheeks before we left. Though I was skeptical at first, the added sparkle really completed my look.
Since I now resided within the four walls of the castle, Sebastian gave me permission to escort myself through the castle as long as he knew where I was going. Leaving the building was another story. There was extra security around all corners of the castle now, anyways. I had more than just his eyes watching over me now. I tried to disregard the way the guards glared at me while I walked by, but we all knew that I was the reason for their new orders.
Pia and I descended down the staircase just as Lucan was climbing up. He gave me a nod of greeting, but nothing more as we passed by each other.
“Why is he in the soldiers’ housing?” I whispered to Pia when we reached the ground floor.
“I dunno. Maybe he's seeing someone,” she snorted.
“That would be quite the age difference.” I laughed. The oldest soldiers that lived on the castle grounds were twelve years older than myself, and Lucan had at least twenty more years on them, if I had a guess.
My mouth fell limp upon my entrance to the great hall. The room was unrecognizable with its exquisite decor that outdid the last gala by miles. Drapes of sparkling cloth hung from the ceiling, accompanied by garland weaved of greenery and white roses. Twinkling lights dripped from the side walls, resembling icicles so clearly that it was as if Caius himself put them there. The gemstones of the gods were depicted throughout the room by clusters of colorful streamers and tinsel. Light reflected onto the dancefloor, twirling off of the satin gowns and suits of the galas attendees.
