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Shane asks if things are serious with me and Austin.
“I have no idea yet,” I say, “But if it weren’t for him… I don’t know where I’d be. Where you’d be. Austin hired you the new lawyer and got you moved to that program. I had no idea he did it. He’s even paying for it and I can’t imagine how much it all costs.”
He blows out a breath.
“Dad left me the house and his money, after his insurance and everything and told me to go back to college with it. I’m going to put half in the bank for when you’re out and ready to re-start your life.”
“Keep it. I don’t want it,” he says bitterly. “Really, it’s yours, Jada. Especially if your man is paying for this program, I’m not taking any cash from you.”
“He wants you to have his Mustang,” I add.
Shane’s expression perks up.
“Yeah?” he asks.
I nod.
“Now that, I’ll take.”
I chuckle.
Shane squeezes my hand.
“It’s sad. I think he gave up on life. He could’ve had so much more.”
I know,” Shane says softly.
We sit quietly for a minute together, lost in our thoughts.
“We should let everyone in. People will have started arriving,” I say.
“Thank you for everything,” Shane says and kisses my cheek. “I’m gonna get better.”
“I know you are,” I say brightly and hug him.
And I hope it’s true.
***
Not only do a dozen people from Dad’s factory come, around twenty people from the bar, Aunt Fay and Darlene, me, Austin, Shane (and his two escorts who sit in the back and stay out of the way), but Andrew, Raven, and three other people from my writing workshop show up. Also, Shane’s friend Sedgewick (who I texted to tell him about the funeral, in case he could show up for Shane), Phil, Kevin, and another friend named Rory that I’ve never met also come, and then after shaking his hand and giving hugs and macho back slaps, Shane says something to Sedgewick, which makes them move away, eyeballing the cop that’s here in plainclothes. That cop has a close eye on them until they move away from my brother.
People all greet us before the service starts, the ones I don’t know explaining who they are, saying nice things.
I’m shocked at the turnout. Particularly people who don’t even know me or Shane.
Sedgewick gets close to me and gives me a hug. “You okay?” he asks.
I nod.
Austin moves in and gets proprietary, putting his arm around me.
Sedgewick grins at me and jerks his thumb at Austin. “Staking his claim? I respect that.”
“Thanks for coming,” Austin says.
I look up at him and his eyes are on Sedgewick but he’s not being an asshole, just being Austin, I guess.
The chapel at the funeral home is nearly full as we take our seats.
I have Austin on my left, Shane on my right.
“Thanks for the suit,” Shane says softly. “You got nice taste in threads. And … for taking care of my sister.”
“My pleasure, man,” Austin replies.
“And for the help with my lawyer and my doctor,” Shane says softly. “You don’t know me, but I won’t make you regret that.”
“It’s my pleasure,” Austin repeats. “I did that knowing Jada. That was enough. For real.”
Shane holds his hand out and shakes Austin’s hand.
My chin trembles as I stare at my father’s urn. My eyes go blurry as they fill with tears.
And then, just before things get started, I hear the hum of activity and look over my shoulder and see Adele, Carly, and Aiden come in with another man and three women. I’m not sure who the rest of them are, but Carly blows a kiss and I smile. Austin’s arm goes around me. Shane takes my right hand. I hold on.
“Did you know they were coming?” I ask.
“Yeah. My father and his girlfriend plus Carly’s mom and aunt are also here.”
I’m surprised.
“Why?” I whisper.
He smiles.
“Maybe they thought you wouldn’t have a big turnout. But the turnout is a good one, isn’t it?” Shane puts in.
That’s so kind of these people.
“Your father?” I whisper to Austin.
He squeezes my hand and kisses my temple.
“He’s gonna love you.”
And my lungs start burning.
For Austin to tell his father, does that mean what it sounds like? I’m not sure I have the ability to process that. But I don’t get much of a chance to think on it because the doors close and the screen behind the podium starts showing images of landscapes. Of sky. Of water and mountains. My father’s name and date of birth scroll across the screen. The funeral director walks up to the front and tells us all we’re going to get started.
I start to tremble, but can’t contain all my emotion, so it rains from my eyes.
Austin pulls me closer. Shane squeezes my hand tighter. And I don’t have to endure it all alone.
