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I shake my head.

“Never stocked up. Wasn’t plannin’ this,” he says.

“I’ve been celibate for three years,” I shrug. “I’ve only ever been with one guy. If I had any, they’d probably be expired.”

He laughs and then sobers. “Just one guy?”

My face heats and I avoid the question and keep talking. “I’m on the pill though. It’s… for cycle reasons. I haven’t been with anyone. If you’ve been safe, um, I guess I can assure you that I definitely do not have grown-up cooties.” I smile.

“Gonna need a condom,” he says with a look that … does that mean he doesn’t believe me? Or that he’s not sure he’s been safe?

Oh. It’s like cold water on my libido.

Is Austin worried he could have grown-up cooties?

And is Austin turned off by my inexperience?

“Just my policy. Better to be safe,” he says, obviously seeing the worry in my eyes. “Get some later. We’ll still play,” he adds and then he’s covering me.

I’m staring at him with wide eyes.

“If you want to,” he adds.

“Uh,” I reply. “Gotta say I’m suddenly a little nervous about the far-reaching impact of us doing this.”

“Let’s just do it,” he says with a big smile. We’re just two people who are attracted to one another, having fun playing a little physical contact game.”

“What game is that?” I dare to ask.

His mouth splits into a big smile. “It’s called, Let’s count how many times Austin can make Jada come in an evening.”

“Whoa.”

I feel like a loser for reacting that way, until he smiles again in a way that makes me think he finds me amusing or cute, and then he begins to slide backwards, slowly, until his mouth is over my boobs. My bra is undone and then his lips are on my breasts.

“Mm. Been wanting a look at these,” he says and then he takes a nip out of the side of the right one.

“Ow!” I gasp.

“That’s a penalty for all the times you’ve taunted me by coming out with no bra on.”

“How many times is that?” I ask as I gasp again while my head lolls because he takes my nipple into his hot mouth and pulls on it while swirling his tongue around it.

He lets go to say, “At least twice.”

I laugh.

“Though I’ve looked at them more often than that.”

His mouth descends further down my body.

“And?” I ask, arching my torso toward him.

“And I like ‘em. A lot.”

He dots kisses down my ribcage to my belly button, and then his hands, holding both my hips glide down. He gently parts my thighs.

My heart loudly gallops in my chest as his mouth touches down and his tongue exerts pressure at the perfect place.

He swipes across that spot with his hot tongue.

“Not exactly a piece of blackened Wonder Bread, but I hope it’ll do.”

I choke on laughter burying my face in my bicep in utter mortification.

Laughing, he caresses my butt cheek in a way that feels reassuring.

“I don’t know where the fuck that came from,” I giggle.

And my giggle quickly dies as he swipes his tongue across me again, as his grip tightens on my body like he’s done joking and is about to get serious about what he’s doing.

A little moan escapes.

And I feel embarrassed about that because I’m so inexperienced at this, but he’s giving no indication that it bothers him. In fact, he’s staring into my eyes intensely as he continues to lick and kiss down there, like he’s looking for more reactions.

I take a deep breath and slowly let it out as he kneads my butt.

His lips cover my clit and then his tongue dives inside again as he suckles, gently.

I’m going to climax. I’m going to climax huge on Austin’s face.

Oh my God, this is so, so fucking hot.

My fingers find their way into his hair. God, it is soft. His eyes drift closed, like he likes the way that feels, me touching him. My other hand finds its way into his hair, too, and I sift my fingers through it as sensation takes over every bit of my thoughts.

My breathing quickens and my hips start jerking. My grip on his hair tightens. And I’m coming. I’m coming and he’s working me harder, faster, sending the sensation from a 10/10 to a whopping 100 out of 10.

“Ah!” I cry out and then I’m whimpering as I ride his tongue.

Holy cow. Holy shit, that’s good.

I’m gasping for breath when Austin moves up my body, kissing my boobs again, and then the next thing I know, I’m reaching for his dick and pushing him to his back.

I tried to give Josh head once and I was so clumsy at it that he stopped me, told me we’d work up to that another time. We never got that chance.

Josh was the only one I had any experience with. He made me come with his fingers a few times. He did oral sex on me once, but I couldn’t let go. We fooled around and got to second or third base a bunch in our time together but didn’t have actual sex until near the end. I’ve had actual intercourse a total of four times, all happening in the last three weeks before he died.

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