Page 42 of Pure Temptation

“But that’s the problem. I really do.”

Maybe he could never forgive her for pushing him like this, or maybe at some point, he would understand just how desperately scared she would have to be to ask it. But even as his cold glare broke her heart, she didn’t want to take it back.

He stared at her through a few more fuming breaths. “Are you saying that as my physical therapist, or is that a personal request?”

“Of course it’s personal,” she whispered. “I know you’re going to do this climb and the next one. It’s who you are, and I hate that I want to change that. Part of me even wants you to do all these amazing things.”

Some of the anger faded from his expression, and in its place, she saw hurt.

Kendall swallowed back the lump in her throat and continued. “But I also know myself. This is my breaking point. I can’t let myself fall in love with someone who lets himself be one loose handhold away from death, over and over again.”

How many nights had she woken up in the middle of the night, thinking about her father, stuck on a ridge, surrounded by flames on all sides? Enough to know that this feeling didn’t get better with time.

How could she even consider a relationship with Daxon, who seemed to love the challenge of high-consequence adventures even more than her father did? This wasn’t a rift; it was a chasm, deep and wide, and no amount of discussion was going to bridge it. She had to cut this off now, because she couldn’t handle going down that road again.

Kendall had no idea how long they stared at each other, waging silent warfare. And then, suddenly, it ended, or at least Daxon stepped out of it. His eyes softened, and he took a long breath. “I’m going to figure this out. I know you don’t believe it, but I will.”

Kendall didn’t speak. He could do all the figuring out he wanted by himself, but it still didn’t change the fact that he was going to go climb a mountain with no ropes. That he chose a path that had led other top climbers to their deaths.

Daxon wrapped his hands around her waist, silently calling her back to him. This was the very last time she would lie with him. This amazing man who was so full of laughter and energy and life might not be alive in a few weeks. Or maybe it would be the El Cap climb that would be his downfall. She had to live with that. But this was their last night, her last chance, so she eased back onto his chest, closed her eyes, and tried like hell to concentrate on the moment she was in. It was a resounding failure.

Kendall must have dozed off because there was no trace of sunlight when Daxon whispered in her ear, asking if he could stay the night. When they lay in her bed for the last time, she curled up next to him, breathing in his scent, memorizing it. His heart thumped wildly in his chest, and his breaths were uneven. She drank in every detail, getting her fill one more time.

He woke her in the middle of the night, hard, his big body flush behind hers, his arm wrapped around her, pulling her against him. His muscles strained as he held her, thrusting, his breath heavy in her ear. She came twice before he followed her, his lips in her hair, whispering things she couldn’t hear.

He awoke early. The sun was just peeking over the horizon when he leaned down to kiss her, fully clothed.

“I won’t come to say goodbye before I leave for the airport,” he said softly. “I’d rather end like this.”

She nodded.

“Goodbye, Daxon,” she whispered, not wanting to see his expression. But she made herself look at him one more time. “I hope you get everything you’re looking for up on that mountain.”

He blinked down at her, his gaze searching. But there was nothing to search for anymore.

So she closed her eyes and let him go.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

KENDALLSATONthe floor of her tiny living room, staring at the blank screen of her television. The last week since Daxon had left had been miserable, and today was sinking into new depths. She was not going to watch his climb. She was not going to torture herself, analyzing every step he took, watching for each little slip of his foot, looking for signs of fatigue.

But not watching was just as nerve-racking as watching. Daxon could have, at this point, already fallen to his death, and she wouldn’t know. As it turned out, it mattered a hell of a lot whether he was alive somewhere else in the world, even if they were never going to see each other again.

Kendall couldn’t shake the restlessness that had been building in her, and it wasn’t just fueled by fear. What if Daxon did make it to the top of the mountain? Part of her wanted to see his mastery of this mountain, share it with him. Not watching felt...a bit lonely.

God, she missed him, his deep, easy laugh, the intense attention that he had given to her while they were together. During his stay at the Kalani, the world of his next Pure Adrenaline stunt had been on hold, and oh, what a glorious week it had been. That cliff jumping day was the best of her life. Honestly, the entire week had been.

Damn you, Daxon Miles. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. Maybe she should just go ahead and watch instead of spending the next few hours staring at the blank screen, making herself miserable.

A knock on the sliding glass door startled her out of her agonizing.

“Kendall?”

Alana’s head appeared through the sliding door. Her friend’s gaze slid to the dark TV screen, where Kendall had been staring. Alana quirked up an eyebrow. “Busy?”

Kendall shrugged. “Come join thenot-watchingparty.”

Alana slid opened the door and stepped in, plopping a bag down next to Kendall. “Sounds fun. I brought refreshments.”