And I never look back.
“No light, no light in your bright blue eyes. I never knew daylight could be so violent. A revelation in the light of day. You can’t choose what stays and what fades away. And I’d do anything to make you stay. No light, no light. No light. Tell me what you want me to say.”
– Florence + The Machine, “No Light, No Light”
Eight Years Later
Ipush the old, frosted glass door open, entering Mill’s Coffee House. The scent of cinnamon and coffee invade my nostrils, and I happily breathe it in. The little bell jingles above me, one of my favorite sounds since every time I hear it means I get to see her face.
Her breathtakingly stunning, freckled face.
But as eager as I am to see her, ’cause I always am, I am also nervous as fuck.
Leo says she has been keeping a secret and I hate that she couldn't…no wouldn't come to me sooner. But it doesn’t matter. We will get through it. Together.
My pretty bird has been fighting me since the day I purposefully put myself in her path. It has been the hardest, most aggravating struggle to get her to open up, to trust me, but it’s worth it. She is worth it, and I will live every day of my life showing her that she is mine. And I am hers.
I expect to find her behind the bar. In her cute little black apron, curls tied atop her head, some particularly wild ones falling into her face.
But I don’t. Nat pulled me aside after school, saying she had an emergency. I couldn't ignore her but all she wanted was to talk about us. I got here as soon as I could. I figured Leo would wait for me. This is important. I know it is. I can feel it. As if I am part of her, I can always feel when she is upset.
Ski is behind the bar. The quietness in the shop and his demeanor tell me all I need to know. Something is wrong.
“Where is Leo?”
He looks up from a small piece of paper in his hands. His eyes are full of tears that refuse to fall.
“Ski, where is Leora?” I say a little louder now. The darkness I keep buried begins to claw its way up my throat. Infiltrating my voice.
“Gone, Everett. She’s gone.”
I feel my chest tighten. I physically have to think about pulling in air and releasing it.
“What do you mean, gone?”
“Your mother stopped by. I didn’t hear their conversation. But she left this.” He hands me a check written for five hundred dollars, made out to Leora Laney. “She left, and then so did Leora.” He is silent a moment.
I can’t bring myself to move. To speak. To function.
“Everett. She ran. She took her bag and her money.”
“No.”
“Everett, what happened?”
“I…I don’t know. She has been off the last month, but I just thought I needed to give her time and then she would come to me, I didn’t… If I had known she would actually run…I…”
Would I have pushed her, though? No. I wouldn’t have. My pretty bird has always been a flight risk. I just thought she would take me with her.
I fucking love her.
She knows that.
She is just scared.
Something spooked her.
What. The. Fuck. Happened?
