His gaze flickered between Jerah and Florian for a brief moment before he stepped toward the table and sat down next to Florian. “Good morning,” he answered Jerah, before looking at Florian directly. Florian looked away to glare down at his plate, still trying to calm the roiling anger in his chest. “Everything alright?”
“Oh, yes,” Jerah said, and there was a beat of awkward silence before he added, “I was just telling Florian that we were going to be leaving in a few days now, and about the feast I'm planning the night before we go.”
“I see,” Kade said, and Florian could feel his gaze linger on him, but he couldn't bring himself to look up. He did manage to relax his mouth to a more neutral expression, though his whole body still felt tense.
Kade began to eat quietly, but otherwise the silence dragged on and filled the dining hall. Jerah was the first to break, standing abruptly.
“Well, Florian, I'll see you in a bit for our lesson,” he said, and he turned to go without waiting for a reply. When he had disappeared beyond the door, Kade turned his head fully to look at Florian, his eyebrows slightly raised.
“What's going on?” he asked, and Florian groaned. How could he explain it?
“I just... learned some stuff,” he muttered, pushing his food around his plate with a fork to avoid looking at Kade as he spoke. He could practically feel the unconvinced stare coming from Kade, but he stubbornly kept his eyes downcast all the same.
“What stuff?” Kade pressed.
“Bad stuff.”
“I don't understand.”
“Look, it doesn't have anything to do with you, okay?” Florian snapped, whipping his head to glare up at Kade. Kade didn't even flinch—his expression unchanged—but Florian regretted the words almost instantly. All the tension seemed to drain from him at once as he wilted under Kade's unmoving face. “Sorry. I just..”
The words wouldn't come, but not for lack of trying as his mouth opened and closed silently for a moment. Then with a groan, he pushed his plate of food away and folded his arms onto the table, pressing his forehead into them.
“Did you know that he faked my death?” he asked, his voice muffled against the cool tabletop. “That he let everyone think I died?”
He felt more than heard a sharp intake of breath from Kade, a pause, then the same breath released in a long, slow sigh.
“I did,” Kade answered quietly. “I thought you did, too.”
“I didn't,” Florian sighed, tilting his head to look up at him again with a miserable expression. “I guess I don't know how to feel about it. I'm really... pissed off about it, I guess, but I don't know what I would rather him have done.” His eyes had filled with tears before he realized, and he pressed his face back into his arms, embarrassed. “I just—Why did he have to do it? Why did he send me away? He was my dad. He was supposed to take care of me.”
For a long moment they were both silent, and a trickling dread—that his outburst was too much for Kade to handle—started creeping up his spine. Then he felt a soft, tentative touch on his shoulder that slid down along his ribs to settle on the small of his back, leaving a comforting warmth in its wake.
“I don't know,” Kade replied, his voice barely above a whisper. Somehow that, too, was soothing. “I don't know, but I think you should talk to him. Jerah is fallible, like all of us, but I think he's a good person.”
Florian sighed—Kade's words weren't exactly what he wanted to hear, but still he leaned into the soft touch.
“I guess you're right,” he said begrudgingly. Kade's eyes softened when he looked over, knowing Florian wasn't convinced; but Florian stood up all the same. “I'll go talk to him. Our lesson is starting soon anyway.”
“Florian,” Kade said as he started to walk away. He turned back around and watched as Kade seemed to consider his next words carefully, before saying, “You don't need to forgive him, but I think if you understand why he did what he did, it'll be easier.”
Florian blinked. It made sense, of course, but still his heart surged with frustration against the idea. It sounded too much like what August had told him when Jerah had first reappeared in his life. But why should he have to understand why his father left him, why he let the world believe he was dead? The thought of having an entire prophecy about him weighed heavily enough on his shoulders—did he really have to be the one to be the bigger person, too?
“Okay,” was all he managed to answer before he turned again and left the dining hall.
