“When I saw you in the grocery store, I knew I’d been kidding myself to think I’d gotten over you.That I ever would get over you.Then I saw the baby and you told me I was her father.I was the father of this perfect little girl.I’d have done anything to be a part of her life.To be a part of your life.But you hated me.And I couldn’t blame you.”
“I never hated you.But I had the baby and I couldn’t afford to rely solely on my emotions.Sophie was the important one.Everything else took a back seat to doing what was best for her.”
“You do that every day.You’re an amazing mother.I might not deserve happiness, but you and Sophie do, and I want to be able to give that to you.I want you so badly, Aria.Seeing you again made me realize how damn much I’d missed you.How stupid I’d been to leave you.I want it all.You, Sophie, and the dream.”
“The dream?”
He smiled.The one that always made her realize how much she wanted him.
“It’s not picket fences but it’s close.A family to love.A family who loves me.A dog.Maybe two dogs.More babies.Marietta.I’ve gotten attached to it.I have my friends, I have a rewarding career, and what would make it perfect is you, Sophie, and me together.I want to marry you and be a family.”
Oh, God, he was asking her to marry him?“Ryan, I—”
He held up a hand.“Don’t worry.I know you’re not ready, and I’m not sure you’ll ever be able to trust me again.I wish I knew what to do to prove to you that I love you and Sophie and want to be with you always.But I don’t, so I guess I’ll just keep on trying.”
He got up and looked down at her with a smile.“I’m working tomorrow night.I’ll give you a call and see how you’re doing.”He leaned down to kiss her.“See you later.”
“Do you have to leave?”
“I think I should.Until you know you want me here, if you ever do, I should stay at my place.But I’ll be around and if you ever need me all you have to do is call.”
Once, she’d believed that she could live in the moment with Ryan.That she could love him and have him for as long as it lasted, and once it ended she could deal with it.As long as Ryan continued to be involved with Sophie, and she knew he would, she could deal with whatever happened.
She’d been wrong.
*
Aria saw Stevena number of times over the next few weeks.He looked more tired, more frail each time she saw him.But he was always happy to see her, and she could tell that he looked forward to their talks.They talked a lot, mostly about Aria’s life now, but also about her mother.She told him the truth about their life and how hard it had been.But she also told him that her mother had never said a word against her father.And that Aria believed her mother had loved him until the day she died.She’d wondered about the wisdom of telling him how hard his absence had made their lives.But he’d demanded the truth, so she told him.
One day Ryan went with her, and they took Sophie to see him.Sophie was seven months old now and very verbal, although no one could understand what she was saying.Ryan swore he could, though.Aria told him he was dreaming.Not only was Steven charmed by Sophie, but the whole facility was as well.
The next time Aria went to see him, Steven wanted to know about Ryan, and she wound up telling him the whole story, from when they met until the present.He made a good audience.Occasionally, he’d ask questions, but he seemed content to let her talk and tell him as little or as much as she wanted him to know.They talked about the baby, of course.And about her business.
“You’re the reason I love plants,” she said one day.
“How am I the reason?”
“It was the African violet you gave me all those years ago.I’ve loved plants ever since.I always had a lot of them wherever I lived.So when I quit my hospital administrator job and had Sophie, I decided I was finally going to do something I loved.Something to do with plants.Marietta seemed like a good place to raise a child and start a nursery business.And Ryan was here.”
“You love him, don’t you?”
“Yes.”She closed her eyes.“So much.”
“Are you going to forgive him?”
She opened her eyes and frowned.“There’s nothing to forgive.The whole thing with the Realtor was a misunderstanding.I-I jumped to the wrong conclusion.”
“I didn’t mean that.I meant for leaving you back in Denver.”
“Oh, that.”She tried not to focus on the past.But she couldn’t forget it.“I did forgive him.That isn’t the problem.No matter that I love him and forgave him, I don’t trust him not to do it again.”
“You don’t know what I’d do to be able to change the past.To never have left you and your mother.To never have lost all those years.”
“You couldn’t help it.You were sick.”
“And Ryan wasn’t?”
“He never talked about his army career.I had no idea he was still having a hard time with what had happened.I didn’t know.”
