Rowan’s eyes darkened. “You think the Assembly is behind the attack on Nightfall?”
“Who else would benefit from keeping Jupiter isolated? From making sure she has no one to turn to except them? If her shield is in danger, she comes running to save the day and they know that.” I shook my head. “We’ve been waiting for her for generations, but so have they. And they had her where they wanted her until Nightfall fucked it up for them. I have a feeling they’ll do anything to keep their weapon close.”
“When we get back to Imperium, we gather the others and we tell her everything. No more secrets. No more half-truths. She deserves to know what she is.”
“And if she hates us for keeping it from her eventhislong?”
The question hung in the air, voicing my deepest fear. I’d already fallen for her harder than I’d thought possible. The thought of her looking at me with betrayal in those starlight eyes made my chest ache.
“Then that’s the price we pay. But I won’t lie to her anymore. We can’t build anything real on a foundation of secrets.”
Rowan was quiet for a long moment before nodding. “You’re right. No more lies.”
The bathroom door opened, and Jupiter stepped out. My breath caught in my throat yet again. She looked ethereal in the dim light, but her eyes were rimmed with red, as if she’d been crying. My first instinct was to go to her, to ask what was wrong, but I held back. Being this close to her former shield must be tearing her apart, reopening wounds that had barely begun to heal.
She avoided our gazes as she padded across the room, her movements slow and careful. Without a word, she crawled onto the bed between us, pulling the sheet up to cover herself.
“You okay?” Rowan asked softly.
She nodded. “Just tired. It’s been... a lot.”
I exchanged a glance with Rowan over her head. Now wasn’t the time. She was exhausted and emotionally drained. The truth could wait until we were back on our own territory, with all of us together. Instead of pressing, I simply lifted my arm, offering her a place against my chest. She hesitated for only a moment before curling against me, her head resting over my heart. Rowan shifted closer behind her, draping his arm across her waist, cocooning her between our bodies.
“Rest,” I murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “You’re safe with us always.”
Her body gradually relaxed as sleep claimed her, her breathing evening out into a gentle rhythm, but I didn’t miss the small wet puddle of tears soaking into the pillow beneath her head.
I stayed awake, watching the shadows play across her face, memorizing every detail. In sleep, she looked younger, unburdened by the weight of her designation and the expectations everyone else had for her.
I thought about what awaited her when we returned to Imperium. The truth about the Order, about the prophecy that had foretold her coming, about her role in reconnecting our worlds. Would she understand that we hadn’t been trying to deceive her, but rather ease her into a truth so vast and overwhelming that it had been kept hidden for millennia?
Rowan’s eyes met mine over Jupiter’s sleeping form. “She’s going to change everything.”
“She already has.”
19
Eris
I couldn’t fucking breathe.
The images flooded my mind through the bond over and over again. Jupiter’s eyes, wide with pleasure. Her dark hair splayed across white sheets. Her lips parted as she moaned—not for me, not for any of us, but forthem. For those fucking Stardust bastards who’d swooped in and took what should have been ours.
I slammed my fist against the wall, the plaster cracking under my knuckles. Pain shot up my arm, but it was nothing compared to the agony tearing through my chest.
“Fuuuck!” I roared, the word tearing from my throat like broken glass.
Percy and Aiden sat across from me on the couch, passing a joint between them, their eyes bloodshot and haunted. They felt it too. Every thrust, every gasp, every whispered word of praise from those fucking pricks echoed through our bond with excruciating clarity.
I stalked to the window, staring out at the dark campus. My reflection in the glass showed a man I barely recognized. Hollow-eyed, gaunt, a ghost of the warrior I once was. I hadn’t slept properly in weeks. I hadn’t eaten. Hadn’t done anything but drown in whiskey and self-loathing.
The sofa behind me taunted my sanity as I remembered Jupiter straddling my lap that night, her body warm and trembling as I’d entered her. The way she’d looked at me, like I was the only man in the universe. The rightness of her in my arms, the perfect fit of our bodies together.
I’d never feel that again. I’d never hold her again, never taste her skin or hear her whisper my name as she came apart. Because I’d thrown it all away. We all had.
“I can’t do this anymore,” I said, my voice breaking. “I can’t live like this, feeling her with them, knowing she’s moving on while I?—“
“While you what?” Draco snapped from his chair in the corner. He looked like death warmed over, his pale face drawn, dark circles under his eyes. “While you wallow? While you drink yourself into oblivion and talk about how you hope the next bane attack finishes you off?”
