SMS silence. Nobody is typing.
NOMI
YOU COME BACK TO THIS CHAT RIGHT NOW, EVE IONIDES, OR ELSE I’M COMING UP THERE!
Then, from above: “FUCKING GET OVER IT, NOMI! IT’S HAPPENING!” muffled through the floors.
I yell up at the ceiling. “NO, IT’SNOT!”
“YOU NEED TO GET LAID. WE’VE ALL DECIDED, IT’S FOR YOUR OWN FUCKING GOOD!”
An outraged huff exits my body. I march up the stairs and throw open her front door. “Who the hell iswe?!”
Eve whirls around in her kitchen, apron on, whisk raised in self-defense. “Theroyal we, of course!”
I fold my arms. “Names. Now.”
Eve points the whisk at me. “You want names? Fine. Your mom, Graham, me, the bartender at the Salty Taco—”
I blink at her. “You’re discussing my sex life with strangers at the lesbian bar?!”
“Kaleigh is a close, personal friend!” Eve yells. “With sage and timely advice!”
A clot of pale green cream drips off the whisk and splats onto the vinyl floor. We both look at it, then back at each other. “Eve,” I moan, then throw myself onto her couch. Big Bird promptly hops into my lap and begins batting at my chin, which I try to dodge. “You already invited him against my will. Don’t do this to me.”
Eve takes a deep breath, tosses the whisk into the bowl, then joins me on the couch. “First of all, it wasn’t against your will. You were horrified for two seconds, then I saw the excitement form on your face in real time. Youlikehim, Nomi. You never like anyone! Don’t you think that means something?”
“No,” I cross my arms, and Big Bird uses them like a ladder to get closer to my nose. “Not really.”
Eve rolls her eyes. “You’ve always been able to sayno,thanksto the guys that like you, but you can’t with him, and that scares you.”
“He annoys me!”
“He wakes you up, and that’s a good thing, Nomi. Someone needs to.” Eve exhales through her nose. “Listen, if you were happy living this acetic hot-nun lifestyle where you never date or have sex or even entertain romantic relationships, I would gladly leave you be. But you’re not happy. I can’t endorse your decisions that ultimately harm you, and that you’re making out of fear.”
My mouth opens, but surprise hinders my words. “I—what?I thought you were stoned! Where’s this coming from?”
“Iamstoned. You know that Sour Diesel sativa blend you got me for creativity? Pretty sure it’s jacked up my IQ by thirty points. I solved theNew YorkTimesCrossword in like, three minutes today.” Eve holds up one finger, runs to the kitchen, then returns with a spoon heaped with budder cream. “Here. Emotional support frosting.”
I take a small lick and sigh miserably.
“I know you don’t like to talk about your health problems, which means that, even as your best and hottest friend, I don’t know exactly what you’re facing. But I do know that life is easier when we let others love us.Allof us, the good parts, and the bad. And there is so, so much good in you, Nomi. You deserve to love and be loved.” Eve smiles kindly, which is altogether a very frightening look for her. “And when you don’t make your own moves, that meansIhave to for the good of the order. Plus, Kayleigh’s really invested in you two getting together, and it’s giving me a reason to text her, so.” Eve claps her hands. “Chop chop, as they say.”
“I’m cutting you off from Sour Diesel.” I take another big lick. “And Kayleigh.”
“Ha! I’d like to see you try.”
I exhale a long, deep breath. “Look, I hear what you’re saying, and it all sounds really wise, but I’m not sitting here thinking stuff like,boo hoo, I’m sick, I don’t deserve to be loved!” I shake my head, annoyed that that’s how it looks to my own best friend. “And my feelings for Julian are… complicated.”
“Complicated how?” Eve asks. “Tell me. Open up. Do you need more budder cream?”
I hand her the spoon, and she brings it back, refilled.
“Idolike Julian a lot,” I begin, taking another lick. “But he’s… like a mosquito bite.”
Eve arches an eyebrow. “If you thought that was a clear and complete thought, you’re wrong.”
“Ever since he moved back, he’s been this—itch—constantly reminding me of his presence, driving me crazy, you know?”
