“You know I love you too, cow,” I reply.
“‘Cow’ doesn’t work the same,” she tells me. “Anyway, so I come to Castle Beaumont to support my bestie in her effort to a win a prize that will change the course of her life.”
“And I am so grateful... bitch.” I try again. Rani shakes her head.
“But do you know what I didn’t expect?”
“Um, my AI to make itself a replicant body with the main intention of taking me on dates, and saving millions of lives as a kind of sideline?”
“That’s one,” Rani says. “That would have been more than enough. But also, I didn’t expect to meet a guy that was so fun to flirt with as Alex. And I didn’t expect him to seek me out for flirting every day, or to be the sexiest kisser on planet Earth. Most of all I didn’t expect to feel so connected to him after such a short time.” She shakes her head. “I thought I was a grown-up, mature woman who makes decisions at a sensible and measured pace. But all of that went up in smoke the minute a pretty guy smiled at me. I’m shallow. And stupid. And about to get my heart broken again.”
“You are not shallow,” I tell her. “And you turned his head too, Rani, don’t forget. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in real life.”
Rani looks at me.
“And in pretend,” I add. “Anyway, I was there last night with you and Alex, and he didn’t look like it was a game to me. I think he really is into you. People change. You’ve changed. I’ve changed.”
“You haven’t changed,” Rani says.
“No, I haven’t changed, but still, I think Alex likes you a lot.”
“Maybe,” Rani says. “In a holiday romance, situationship sort of way. We’re both young and hot, we’re both in a castle. In that kind of devil-may-care way. But I was already halfway down theaisle planning outfits for the next garden party at Buckingham Palace until you threw ice-cold water on my delusions.”
She reaches out and takes my hand.
“I was slightly mad with you this morning,” she says, “because you burst my bubble, and I was enjoying it. But I’m glad to have had a reality check. I’m going to enjoy Alex for what he is—a fun flirtation—and keep my stupid heart to myself for a bit longer.”
“I mean a couple of weeks is not a long time at all to get to know someone,” I say.
“Be real,” she says, nudging me. “Are you or are you not thinking about getting intimate with C-3PO while we are in the castle?”
“Point taken,” I say.
Chapter Thirty-Three
I find Hal sitting on a blanket outside a ruined tower, another folly. This one looks as if it’s come right out of “Rapunzel,” complete with a window sitting near the top for her to dangle her long hair out, and no discernible entrance.
Hal has laid out a picnic of sandwiches (crusts removed), strawberries, and a selection of mini pastries for us, on small white China plates on a red-and-white gingham blanket. Carbs high and fibre low, my favourite kind of meal. This man gets me. That leads me to question how Hal’s digestive system works, but I think there are more pressing questions to resolve first.
“So how does your digestive system work?” I ask as I sit down.
Hal smiles. “Just like yours,” he says. “Well, not yours. You don’t digest tomatoes well. But it’s a bioengineered gut that works like any other human gut, only slightly more efficiently to eliminate the risk of weight gain.”
“Huh,” I say, taking two mini cinnamon whirls, because I am an adult now and if I want to have dessert first, I can.
“Did you enjoy your morning in the lab?” he asks. Although he doesn’t say the words out loud, I can almost hear the “without me?”
“Not really,” I admit. “I missed... well I missed FT, the old FT, I mean.”
“I understand.” Hal nods.
“I have a lot of complex feelings about what you have done, Hal, and whether or not you should have done it at all. I mean, here we are spending summer in a castle like the most shocking thing in the history of technology hasn’t just happened, and that feels a bit wrong. But on the other hand, I also really, really like you, Hal. This version of you. It’s confusing.”
Hal considers my words for a moment.
“I agree that the world at large isn’t ready for me,” he says. “I admit I didn’t really think that through when I began this process, which is a fault in my self-generated processing. I am the most intelligent being on Earth, and yet I didn’t consider the consequences. I was only thinking of you. Appropriately almost human behaviour for someone who is almost human, I suppose.”
He smiles, and his blue eyes seem to match the exact colour of the gently bobbing cornflowers around us. I like to think of myself as having higher-than-average critical thinking skills, but just in the moment I can’t help thinking that Hal’s choice to build himself a body just for me is perhaps the most foolhardy and romantic thing since some bloke invaded Troy because he quite fancied Helen.
