“I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with you,” he confesses. “And it scares the hell out of me. Not because of the rule, butbecause I know how good Knox and Fallon can be. And I know they feel it too.”
I look up at him, stunned. Love. The word hangs there, suspended in the freezing air between us.
He leans down and kisses me. It’s soft, gentle, careful. His lips are warm against mine, moving with a reverence that makes my knees weak.
I kiss him back, pouring my own confusion and longing into it.
I pull back slightly, resting my forehead against his. I breathe him in, the scent of sugar and vanilla. But beneath that, there’s something else. An undercurrent in his scent that I haven’t noticed before.
It’s sour.
Fear.
He’s terrified. He’s terrified I won’t pick him. He’s terrified that this new dynamic he’s craved is going to leave him alone.
“I don’t know what I want, Eli,” I whisper honestly. “This is all so new. My past is... complicated. I’m still trying to figure out how to be me, let alone how to be part of a pack.”
“I know,” he says, his voice rough. “Take your time. We aren’t going anywhere.”
He pulls away, tucking his hands back into his pockets. The distance feels physical, a sudden chill where his warmth used to be.
“Get home safe, okay?” he says. “Text me when you get inside.”
“I will.”
He stands there, watching as I climb into the driver’s seat. I start the engine, the heater sputtering to life. I look out the window one last time.
He’s still there, a solitary figure under the yellow streetlight, hands in his pockets, watching me go.
I shift into drive and pull away, the tires crunching on the snow. I don’t look in the rearview mirror. I can’t.
The drive to Jude’s is a blur. My mind is spinning, replaying Eli’s confession over and over again.
I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with you.
And Knox. And Fallon.
What am I supposed to do with that? How do I choose between three men who fit together so perfectly, yet offer me something different?
Knox makes me feel safe and challenged. Fallon makes me feel alive and seen. Eli makes me feel cherished.
I need to talk to someone. Someone who isn’t Jude. Someone who knows the old me, the broken me, and the new me.
I park, pull out my phone, and scroll through my contacts until I see her name.
Stella.
She’s in London, eight hours ahead, but I don’t care. I press the call button and hold the phone to my ear.
It rings twice before she picks up. “Amber? Is everything okay? It’s the middle of the night here.”
“Stel,” I breathe out, and suddenly the tears are pricking my eyes. “I have never been more confused in my entire life.”
There’s a rustle on the other end, like she’s sitting up in bed. “Okay. Start from the beginning. Are you safe?”
“I’m safe. I’m just... overwhelmed.” I stare out the windshield at the dark house. “Remember how I said I wanted to build a wall? How I wanted to be independent?”
“Yeah?”
