“Is that what you do?”
She nods. “My need to hunt has lessened quite a bit since finding a true mate, but when I desire a hunt, Max lets me use his property. It’s lovely up there with the tall trees.”
“I brought him some cookies to thank him for protecting me.” I have to close my eyes and force aside the memory of the way his blood rushed faster through his veins and arteries. He’d been excited to have me stay for lunch. “It was not my finest moment.”
“What happened?” Walking toward me, her eyes filled with concern, she takes my hand.
The contact is welcome. I spent so many years avoiding Pierre’s touch and being his prisoner; it’s comforting to have the human experience of a hand being held. “He asked me to say for lunch, and when I said yes, his blood…” I shake my head. “I don’t know how to explain it. It was as if his blood sang to me.”
Mari gapes. “Sang?”
I don’t know how else to describe it. “Yes. It was like the sweetest music.”
“What did you do?”
More shame flushes through me. “I ran away.”
“I see.” She leads me back to the house. “Perhaps you need more time. I was going to meditate. Would you like to join me?”
“I don’t meditate. I wouldn’t know how to start.” The idea of sitting still without purpose seems impossible.
She jumps over the wall and walks to the rounded tower that stands at the back corner of the property, overlooking the cemetery and the woods beyond. “I could teach you.”
“Honestly, I don’t know if I can sit quietly for any length of time.” I leap over the wall and take her hand. “Before Pierre changed me, serenity was part of who I was, but now…” I don’t have words for how scattered and ferocious I feel inside. I’m in a constant state of holding back.
“That’s the point, Tilda. We’ll just sit for five minutes. The length of a meditation is something we can build on over time.”
“Five minutes doesn’t sound too bad.” I climb the steps, which are stones cleverly jutting from the tower’s side.
Mari’s meditation tower is like a small turret with a low wall at the top that surrounds three-quarters of the flat top, leaving the space open to the cemetery. The space feels medieval, with an array of cushions, blankets, and pillows strewn around in a rainbow of jewel colors.
She takes a round yellow poof and sits on it.
The blue one appeals to me, and I place it across from her and sit.
With a smile, she says, “Close your eyes.”
I check right and left to make sure no one can see me. Not that anyone would care if I’m sitting on a tower with my eyes closed. It just feels strange. Still, I comply. “Now what?” I grip my knees with tense fingers.
“Relax.” She presses her hands over mine.
Flexing my fingers, I try to do as she says.
“Good. Now imagine a place where you felt safe and happy.” Her voice is soft and soothing, with the hint of her musical tone even when she speaks.
I’ve heard her sing several times in the last few months, and it’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. Since my mindwandered to her voice, I try to pull it back to the present. “Safe and happy?”
“Even if that was a long time ago. Maybe when you were young.”
I picture the lake near my family home in Germany. It’s serene and surrounded by soft grass and tall trees. “Okay.”
“Breathe slow and steady and stay in that place. If your mind wanders, it’s okay, but bring it back to this safe place where nothing can harm you.”
Drawing a deep breath, the local swans are in the lake, waiting for me to join them for a swim.
Warm, strong arms wrap around me, and I’m surrounded by the scent of Max. He’s hugging me, and I feel perfectly at ease for the first time in more years than I care to count.
I jerk out of the memory and open my eyes.
