Page 12 of It's a Widow Thing

“Ooh. Yes,” Kendra said. “One of the nurses in my practice has done it a few times and she said it was so much fun.”

“I’m game. Hopefully there’ll be some hunky guys there,” Daisy replied.

“Hunky guys? Sounds perfect to me,” Aurora added.

Leticia and Orla exchanged disapproving glances. “It sounds like a majority of members agree, so I think that’s settled. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but we’re going axe throwing. Sabrina, can you arrange?” Orla asked.

Sabrina had never been given the reins on one of their outings. Usually, Orla did it. “Absolutely. This will be fun.”

They chatted for another hour or so, then Orla made her trademark move to end the meeting—she stretched both arms about her head, yawned, and said, “Oh, dear. Is that the time?”

The other members quickly got bundled up to go outside, while Sabrina took a moment to gather her coat from the front closet. Leticia and Aurora left first, followed by Kendra and Daisy. “Thank you for hosting, as always,” Sabrina said to Orla.

“My pleasure. You know I love to do it. You know I love having you join us.” She reached for Sabrina’s elbow. “I want to tell you something, darling.”

“Okay…” This sounded serious.

“Did you know that I was about to disband our group when you came along?”

“You were? Why?” Sabrina buttoned up her coat.

“Because I thought I’d run out of people to help.”

Sabrina dropped her head to the side. “But what about helping yourself?”

“That’s the thing. I thought I didn’t need it anymore. But then you came along and I had new energy. And a few months after you arrived, I found that I did need the support. This feeling of being lost, I’m not sure it ever goes away.”

“You don’t think you’ll ever be able to move on?”

Orla shook her head. “There’s no moving on, darling. There’s only learning to live with the pain.”

Sabrina’s heart felt heavy at that thought. She’d been a disaster a year ago. And as much as she wasn’t fully ready to start over, she couldn’t go back to being that version of herself. Was it inevitable that she would? “Nothing else in my life has made me feel more like a work in progress.”

“I know, darling. I know exactly what you mean.”

CHAPTERFIVE

Sabrina straightenedher red silk blouse and smoothed the small crease across the front of her black pencil skirt, then finally mustered the confidence to knock on Michael’s door.

I just need to keep my cool. Have fun. Relax. Laugh. Enjoy his company. I’m not going to sleep with him. Or at least I don’t have to decide right away if I’m going to sleep with him.

Her initial inner dialogue worked for all of two seconds before other, less helpful thoughts crept in.If you’re not going to sleep with him, why bother with matching bra and underwear? And red? Seriously? Oh, and what’s with the contents of your purse?Indeed, tucked under her arm, her black leather clutch felt as if it weighed five hundred pounds under the burden of the small box of condoms Lucy had left on her desk that morning, tied neatly with a bow.

Michael opened the door and all confidence dissolved.Oh shit. I’ll never be able to say no to him.It was impossible to focus on one thing—the sum total of Michael was too much to process. The cut of the dark-blue dress shirt accentuated the perfection of his tall, athletic frame. His dark eyes narrowed seductively. One corner of his mouth turned up, part arrogance, part amusement. She’d have to fake her resolve. No way around that.

“Wow.” His gaze traveled from the hair on her head all the way down to the pointy toes of her black pumps, stopping and circling several times in the middle. Something deep in her chest left her wishing he’d made that pass over her body with his hands. Everything he did made the most feminine parts of her psyche—and her body—spring to life. “You are stunning. Simply beautiful.”

His words were a symphony. It had been a long time since a man had uttered words like “stunning” and “beautiful” to her, especially in that particular tone, a delivery so smooth she wondered how many other women had fallen prey to it. Not that she could fault the women who may have come before her. They never stood a chance.

“Thank you. That’s sweet.” She stepped over the threshold, finding herself even more unfairly under the influence of the man with whom she was determined to spend the next few hours. A bewitching strain of sultry 60s-era R&B teased her ears.I know this song.The Delfonics. Didn’t I Blow Your Mind? Wow. He’s not afraid to pull out the big guns.Candles flickered from the open living room, the same floor plan as Sabrina’s apartment, impeccably decorated in earth tones, with a tufted brown leather sofa, gray wool side chairs, and the most impressive library wall Sabrina had ever seen in a real-life NYC apartment. The dining area beyond was set for two, with wine glasses and yet more candles. “Your apartment is amazing. Did you hire a decorator?”

“Nope. Just the product of twenty years of bachelorhood.” He cupped her shoulder with his impossibly warm hand, but only for an instant. “I don’t know if you noticed, but I even have carefully coordinated throw pillows.”

Even though he was no longer touching her, the heat spread across her skin. “I can see that. Impressive.”

“It’s important to have soft, absorbent things to cry into.”

Now she knew he was just being funny. She gently smacked his arm with the back of her hand. “They’re also handy for lounging and sleeping.”