Page 38 of It's a Widow Thing

“Oh. I see.” Jules knocked her head to one side, then turned to Sabrina with a look of complete confusion on her face.

In the blink of an eye, the realization hit Sabrina. It was like the air had been cruelly sucked right out of her lungs. Jules didn’t know about Andrew. And there Sabrina was, taking her supposed victory lap, feeling like everything she’d worked so hard for wasreallygoing to pay off, and now she was about to be dragged to the very bottom of the deepest, darkest part of the ocean. “Jules, I need to tell you something.”

CHAPTERFIFTEEN

Michael feltlike he was watching a car accident as he listened to Sabrina explain to Jules that her husband had passed away.

“He got sick about a year after you moved to London. I guess I thought you would have seen it on Facebook. Or something.” The sound of Sabrina’s voice was thin and pained. And Michael fully understood for the first time exactly how difficult it must be to have a defining part of your life be both utterly inescapable and yet hidden from view. The agony of Sabrina’s past would always be there, waiting to crop up, even when most inconvenient. A perfect moment? Turned upside down.

“I am so sorry. I had no idea.” Jules reached for Sabrina. She truly looked like a ghost—all color had drained from her face. “I’m so bad at social media. And things were so busy after I moved. I don’t know how I missed it, but I did. I feel so bad that I wasn’t there for the funeral. That I wasn’t there for you.”

As ridiculous as it sounded, there was a part of Michael that felt bad he hadn’t known Sabrina then. That he hadn’t been there to support her in her time of need. Even when he would have had no place in her life at that time, aside from a role as a friend.

“It’s okay,” Sabrina said. “You didn’t know. And I didn’t know that you didn’t know. It’s such a weird thing, anyway. Spreading bad news isn’t my forte at all, and you know, Andrew was such a private person. We didn’t talk about it much at all when he was sick. Afterward, I figured people would find out. I don’t know why I felt like that, but I did.”

“Yeah. Sure. That all makes perfect sense.”

Silence fell between Sabrina and her friend and he wanted so badly to say something, but what? That he was sorry she had to talk about it? That he was sorry that Jules was sorry? No words he could utter would improve a damn thing.

“So that’s the story,” Sabrina said, like she was bookmarking the end of the subject.

“Well, if you ever need to talk about it or anything, let me know. It’s going to take me a while to process this.” Jules glanced across the room and raised her hand in a wave. “I feel bad, but my boss is over there. I really should go talk to her.”

“Yes. Go. We can catch up later. Maybe we can have coffee or go out to dinner.” Sabrina smiled, but Michael could tell that it was forced.

“I’d like that a lot,” Jules said. “I hope you two enjoy the rest of your night. It was nice to meet you, Michael.”

“You too, Jules.”

As she walked away, Michael took Sabrina’s hand. “Are you okay?”

The devastation on her face was so plain. Her eyes were glazed over. Her inner sparkle had been dulled. “I feel like I might get sick. You’d think I would be used to this by now.”

“I don’t see how you could possibly get used to that.” He downed the last of his champagne. “Have you chatted with everyone you needed to talk to?”

She looked around the room, seeming lost. Dazed. “I guess? I’m not sure.”

“Well, you talked to Lela and Echo, right? Those were the two most important people, yes?”

“Yeah.”

He had to get her out of there. What was already a bad situation would be made so much worse if she ran into Lela and Echo in her current state. “Come on. Let’s go get some air.”

“Okay. That sounds good.”

Sabrina trailed behind him, her hand still in his as he led them to the down escalator, then over to the coat check once they’d reached the ground floor. With the party still in full swing, there was thankfully no wait for them to retrieve their things. Michael helped Sabrina with her coat, then took her hand again and they made their way outside. He immediately steered her down 42ndStreet.

“Where are we going?” Sabrina asked.

“Bryant Park. It’s a great place to clear your head.”

“Oh, right. We’re practically right there.”

He held on to her tight, trying to wrap his head around the way she must be feeling right now. Whatever pain she was in, all he wanted to do was make it possible for her to escape it, even when the reality was that there was no getting away from it. He’d never felt so helpless in all his life. He cared about her deeply and the only thing he could do to make things better for her was to simply be present.

When they reached the park, he walked her up the stone steps on the west end to the quiet area where park-goers did Tai Chi in the morning. It was a cool evening, the cloudless sky allowing a day’s worth of city heat to float up into space. Sitting didn’t feel right, so they strolled, taking things slow.

“Do you want to talk?” he asked.