I kissed him on the chest and shuffled up on my elbows to face him. “Thank you. Although I’m not sure we should—”I wiggled a finger between us. “—do this... again. It was amazing... of course... but it might... I don’t know?—”
“Complicate things?” he offered, his face a mask.
I nodded. “Yeah, that.” I waited for him to argue. To pull me up for a kiss or even initiate another round of sex. But other than a slight tightening around his eyes, Ryder’s expression never changed.
“Of course.” He nodded carefully. “But we’re staying friends, right?”
Friends. Had a word ever come with so much fucking disappointment attached?“Absolutely,” I said, overly brightly and unable to hold his gaze as I settled my head back on his chest. “Friends sounds... perfect.”
The room fell silent, bar a cicada drumming up business in the bushes outside the window. But the mood between Ryder and me had shifted. It wasn’t as easy as it had been, and after a couple of minutes, I lifted my head off Ryder’s chest and swung my feet onto the floor.
He let me go without protest.
“I, ah, guess I should shower.” I chanced a look over my shoulder and caught Ryder dragging a hand over his face, like he was troubled by something.
When he saw me looking, Ryder’s expression blanked, and he gave a short nod. “Sounds like a plan.”
“And I suppose I’d better phone my mother again before she calls the police.” The attempt to lighten the mood fell flat, so I got to my feet and gathered my clothes. “I should call my dentist as well.”
Another nod from Ryder before he said, “And I should call Tap. Fill him in on the latest council fuckery.” He hesitated, then added, “You don’t have to leave. You can use my shower, if you want. Without me, of course. Unless...”
I glanced toward his en suite, the idea of showering with him more tempting than I was prepared to admit. But common sense prevailed for once, and I shook my head. “Thanks, but I’ll use the main bathroom. All my stuff is there.”All my stuff?Did I mean the stuff that was actuallyhisstuff, exactly the samestuffas what was inhisshower.Could I sound more like an idiot?
But Ryder didn’t call me on it. Instead, he simply asked, “So, do you think you’ll stay a bit longer?”
I was standing there naked, with my clothes piled in my arms, refusing to sleep with him, and the man was still asking me to stay? “A few more days,” I managed. “But only if you’re sure that’s okay? Then I really need to get back.”
Ryder nodded, not making any effort to cover his own nakedness. It was almost enough for me to ignore all those circling doubts in my chest and simply jump the man where he lay, beg him to fuck me, and to hell with everything else.
“You’re welcome to stay as long as you like,” Ryder reiterated. “I’m not going to keep saying it. A week. Two. Whatever you need.”
I paused at the doorway and steeled myself before looking back. “I’m sure it won’t be that long, but thank you.” I hesitated. “And thanks for... this afternoon. That was—” I couldn’t stop the grin from spreading over my face. “—pretty fucking stupendous, if I’m honest. Eighth principle—” I winked. “—gratitude.”
And finally, Ryder smiled, and I left the room feeling his eyes hot on my back and regret burning in my chest.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
MONDAY, ONE WEEK LATER
RYDER
A weekon from the bedroom affair, and Thaddeus was still ensconced in my cottage; Tap and I were back on the Cumberland job; and the council had given me two weeks’ notice to remove the rocks or they would do it for me. Considering I didn’t really have a leg to stand on as far as the rocks were concerned, I took the delay as a win, and it was all down to Thaddeus’s quick thinking.
Not wanting to risk the long-term welfare of Thaddeus’s tooth, I’d ignored his protests and loaned him my ute to visit the closest emergency dentist in Featherston. The woman had phoned his Wellington dentist and taken a cast for a new crown. She’d told Thaddeus that she would notify him when it was ready, and he could either have her replace it or have it delivered to his Wellington dentist.
When Thaddeus had told me about it that evening, he’d been coy about whether he thought he’d still be in the cottage when the crown was ready. I hadn’t pushed. To be honest, I didn’twant to know. In ten days, I’d got used to him being around. More than used to it, I liked it, and not just because I craved the sight of him like a starving man, but because he was genuinely good company.
Ten freaking days and I was losing my shit over this charming young man.
Ten days of ignoring my sisters’ repeated demands for information on mymystery man—a factoid about my life that could only have come from Tap’s boyfriend, Will, who got on with my eldest sister like fire and kindling.
Ten days of sharing breakfasts with Thaddeus and sometimes Tap as well, the conversation flowing like we’d known each other for years.
Ten days of coming home to a clean house, a goddammed working ventilation system in my glasshouse, and two dead pot plants that I couldn’t water because they were inThaddeus’sbedroom—previously known as theguestbedroom.
Oh boy.
I’d tried to go in there once to check on the poor things, but the sight of Thaddeus’s unmade bed and the smell of his body wash—mybody wash—and I almost sprang a boner on the spot, the memory of him in my bed as clear as if it had happened just yesterday.
