I shake my head. “I’m not.”
“Dominic and Cassian told me the same thing.”
I let out a half laugh. “Both of them?”
“Both of them,” Aiden repeats, his tone decidedly unamused. “They ambushed me the day after you left. Annoyed me plenty, but it was also a good conversation. One in which I realized I haven’t been in control for a very long time. I used control as a way to avoid pain. I take risks every day with the work I do, but I wasn’t willing to put my own heart on the line.”
He steps back, his hands sliding down to capture mine.
“I came tonight because I needed you to see I’m capable of changing. Of being vulnerable and letting people into my life.”
“You certainly did that,” I say with a smile.
“When I saw you dance, I thought I’d lost you.”
I shake my head fiercely. “No. I… I wanted to honor what we had. What you gave me.”
“You inspire me.” He raises my fingers to his lips, lays the gentlest of kisses on my knuckles. “It took my brothers knocking me over the head with the obvious, but you showed me the power of trusting those who care about me. How to let them in.” He smiles. “You were right, you know. I called Randolph after they left.”
Anticipation surges. “And?”
“I told him about David. He’s on board with the New Field proposal on the condition you and I oversee it. Together.”
“Oh, Aiden. That’s incredible.”
“And possible because of you.” His smile dims. “I’m offering myself to you, Seraphina, wounds and all. I want to be with you more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. And,” he adds before I can say anything, “I want a future with you.”
He’s offering me so much. Yet one last barrier still lingers, threatening to derail our reunion.
“I want that with you, too, Aiden.”
“But?”
I want so badly to say I’ll take whatever he’s offering. But I can’t. We both deserve the future we want.
“I told you before that having a family was a nonnegotiable for me.”
He nods. “I’ve done a lot of thinking about that over the last few days. You were afraid I would think differently of you after you shared your story. I didn’t realize I’d been holding on to a similar fear.” He reaches up and cups my face. “Yet you accepted me.”
I turn my head and press a kiss to his palm. “Yes.”
“I will always carry some guilt for what happened to David. But just like I had choices, so did he.” His throat bobs as he swallows hard. “And my father chose to hurt us. I can choose not to repeat the past.”
My chest heaves as I draw in a shuddering breath. “Does that mean…”
“I meant what I said on stage, Seraphina. One of the things I admire about you is your kindness, your compassion. You gave back to the shelter that supported you. You give with intention. You inspire me to do the same, to be a better person.” He lowers his head, presses his forehead against mine the way he did during the photo shoot. “When I’m with you, I can see myself being a good husband. A good father.”
The last threat lurking just beyond our happiness evaporates.
“Are you sure?” I ask.
“I’m terrified,” he says with a slight grin, “but cutting off the possibility of having a family was just another avoidance. Starving myself of any connections to keep myself safe. I’m done living my life that way. When I think about the kind of parent my mother was, the kind of father John could have been if I’d let him in sooner…”
His voice trails off as his eyes grow distant. Then he shakes his head. “I’m finally starting to accept that regret. When I thought about Mom and John and what they did for me, I realized I wanted to have the chance to be even half the kind of parents they were. But,” he adds with another kiss to my fingers, “it’s your choice. It’s always your choice.”
I close the gap between us, lay one hand over his chest. The steady thump of his heart beneath my palm fills me with joy.
“I choose you, Aiden. Always.”
