Patrick has said so many things tonight that make me feel wanted and desired, and I’m ready to call his bluff. If he wants me, fuck it, he can have me, but if he doesn’t, then I’ll know that I was right—and beg Natalie to let me sleep on the couch in her room. If there is a time to be bold, it is right now. Pushing my nerves down, I manage to keep my voice steady.“Do you want me, Patrick?”
The air around us is thick with silence and static electricity. The fingers that nervously play with the edges of fabric on the bottom of my dress stop. He opens his mouth like he’s about to speak, but closes it.
The anticipation is killing me and making me doubt everything up until this point.
My mind starts moving fast.
He doesn’t want me, and I just ruined everything that we have. I think about pulling away, cutting my losses, and going home, but those thoughts instantly stop when I feel his touch for the first time.
I hold my breath as he trails his hands up my sides, starting right above my knees and slowly moving up.
Too fucking slowly.
It’s like he is scared to touch me. He moves his fingers along the curves of my hips and stops to hold my waist. His grip is soft as he stares at where he touches me, like he couldn’t possibly look anywhere else.
“God, Ellie. Of course, I want you—can’t you see what you do to me?" His low, breathy words make my heart pound in my chest. "Fuck, do you have any idea how much self restraint it takes not to have my hands all over you? It doesn’t matterif you’re wearing a pretty little dress or an oversized shirt and sweats because all I can think about is your fucking body. When you kissed me at the park today, I almost tossed you over my shoulder, brought you up here, and—” He stops himself from finishing the thought while his hands run slowly up and down the sides of my body, like he’s holding something delicate. Like if he holds me too tight, I might break. “But, I asked you to help me with this whole fake relationship thing, and I don’t want to be the one to ruin this. I don’t want you to think I’m some sort of creep who asked for your help and then took advantage of it. You are too important, and I can’t let my urges wreck our agreement.”
The nerves cause my hands to shake, but I lean into them, knowing this feels right. “God, Patrick, you have no idea what you’re doing to me, do you?”
It has been years since I’ve put myself in this type of situation, but I can’t resist. The slickness is building between my thighs, and I can feel myself getting wetter as his hands move over the silky fabric at my sides. I don’t think I can stop myself. I don’t want to stop myself.
He gives me permission with two simple words that push me over the edge. “Show me.”
My hands move through his hair, pulling to tilt his face up towards mine, and without a chance to hesitate, I smash my mouth into his with hunger. I’m terrified for a moment that I might have read the situation wrong until he grips my waist hard and pulls me onto his lap so that I’m straddling him. His hands reach around to hold me steady, cupping my ass, as a low groan leaves his lips. “Fuck, El. You are so fucking hot.”
I can feel him growing harder when I grind myself against his hips. Whining as his mouth leaves mine, my body shivers as he trails sloppy kisses down my neck and collarbone. He bites the meat of my shoulder, and I release a tiny yelp.
He smirks up at me. “What? I thought you said you liked when a guy is rough with you.”
When the fuck did I say that to Patrick. I haven’t…
“Oh no—”
Letting out a gasp, I push against him, but his strong grip keeps me on his lap. My memory sparks as I remember flashes of sitting on my couch with Patrick, but that was a dream, right?
I try to find words, but my brain turns to mush when he kisses my neck again. He puts his lips up against my ear, and my nipples harden against the lace of my bra—the added friction is unbelievably delicious.
“You have such a dirty mind, El. I haven’t been able to get your drunken confession out of my head since that night. Who knew you’re such a little slut?” His hand squeezes my breast, and a moan slips out of me. “You hide it so well, baby.”
His words make me squirm in his lap, and if he were to touch me where I need him, he would find me dripping.
This is everything I’ve ever dreamed of. I’ve never had the guts to tell anyone what I want in the bedroom, not even my ex. I’ve always been afraid that they would use it against me or judge me for it, but not Patrick.
Trusting him more than I’ve trusted anyone before, I let my guard down.
He moves one of his hands up the base of my neck and into my hair, kissing up and down my jaw as he speaks. “El, I wantyou so bad. Please, let me have you. I want to taste you, hear you begging for me. I want to hear the sounds you make when my cock is filling you up. I want to fuck you so hard you won’t be able to walk tomorrow.” My breathing becomes sharp. “But I’m not going to do those things without your permission. This is only good for me if I know that it’s something you want. You say no, and I stop right now.”
I am surprised by his candor, and it’s relieving. He yanks me back with a handful of my hair, so I can look him in the eyes. With his other hand gripping my hip, he stops me from grinding down onto him, his actions demanding a response. He stares at me expectantly, so I nod my head, trying to catch my breath.
He pulls my face close to his, and our lips almost touch. There is nothing I need more right now than to kiss him, but he holds me back, his green eyes piercing through me. “Baby, I need you to use your words. Do you want me to do all of that? Do you want me to use you?”
“Y-yes.” I stutter and feel his hand snake around to grab my ass.
“Good girl.” He kisses me hard, but as soon as I lean in, he pulls away. “If you want me to stop at any point, just say the word. I won’t be upset or mad. You’re in control of the situation.”
Chapter 24
Ellie
