Rose didn’t seem to mind, because she flung her arms out and pulled me into a hug. I tensed at the contact, but as her perfumehit me—vanilla sugar, the same she wore in high school—it was like we’d returned to the night before her birthday all those years ago, before all the pain. We were just two sisters who loved each other, and it was as if no time had passed at all.
“I can’t believe it’s really you,” she said, pulling away after a long squeeze. She placed both hands on my shoulders and gave me a once-over. “God, you look so grown up.”
“And you look so…healthy.”
I didn’t mean to sound surprised. I’d imagined this reunion so many times before. I’d known things would be different between us, thatshe’dbe different, because after four years, how could she not? It wasn’t like I was the same person she’d left behind. Heck, I was different from the person I was two weeks ago. Meeting Alec, discovering the letters, taking off on an adventure—all of these things had changed me.
But I’d never expected such a transformation from Rose.
The last time I saw her, she looked sickly. She was too thin and her cheeks were hollow, but now she was back to a regular weight, and there was a glow to her face. And instead of having the overbleached, brittle look I’d grown accustomed to, her hair had its natural golden sheen again. Even the dark circles under her eyes, a permanent fixture from her late-night partying, were gone.
“Thank you.”
Awkward silence followed, and Asha attempted to fill it. She leaned around Alec and waved. “Hey, Rose. Long time, no see.”
“Asha Van de Berg,” she replied, her eyes sparkling with recognition. “Why am I not surprised to see you?”
“Felicity’s the one person who puts up with my constant complaining, so I decided to keep her around,” Asha joked, and she quickly introduced the boys. Surprisingly, she only mentioned Alec’s first name, and besides a polite smile and hello, Rose didn’t give any indication that she knew who he was.
“So…” my sister said once she was acquainted with everyone. “What are you guys doing here?”
“Do you…not want me here?”
“Of course I do!” Her voice was high with shock and a hint of hurt, like she was insulted I’d suggested otherwise. “Why would you ever think that?”
“How could I not? You left without saying good-bye, and I’ve spent the past four years wondering if you were alive.”
Her skin paled as if I was seeing my sister through a black-and-white lens. “You didn’t get my letters?”
I shook my head. “I found them under Mom’s bed on Friday. She’s been keeping them from me.”
Rose didn’t respond immediately, but her face was clear enough: eyes thunderous, mouth twisted like she was sucking on a piece of sour candy. “Are you shitting me?” she exclaimed. “That’s so typical of Mom.” She pulled the door all the way open. “You should come in. We obviously need to talk.”
Five minutes later, I was sitting at my sister’s kitchen table. Her apartment was tiny, but it was soRoseI didn’t mind that every time I shifted in my chair, I knocked my head on the low-hanging cabinet behind me. Picture frames containing snapshots of her travels covered the walls, a collection of seashells lined each windowsill, andthen there was the origami: intricate flowers with layers of petals, cute woodland creatures like foxes and squirrels, and a fierce-looking dragon that must have taken hours to complete. The paper foldings were scattered everywhere. The coffee table. The living room bookshelves. Even the kitchen countertops. It was as if they sprouted up from any available surface like wildflowers in a forest.
Asha, Boomer, and Alec were out exploring restaurants, so it was just the two of us. The three of them had claimed to be hungry, but I knew they were trying to give us some privacy. A bag of Tostitos and salsa were set out between us, and Rose had enough blueberries in the fridge to make me a shake, but neither of us touched the food.
“So…” Rose said.
“So…” I said back.
There was so much I wanted to say, so many questions I needed to ask, but I couldn’t get my brain and mouth to work in unison. Conversations had always been easy between us, but now it felt like forcing small talk with an old acquaintance. It seemed even the natural bond between sisters could break down over time.
Rose was struggling too. She opened her mouth, then snapped it shut. I watched as she tucked her leg up to her chest, propping her chin on her knee. “I don’t know where to start.”
“How about with why you ran away,” I said, fiddling with the spoon in my shake.
“Ran away?Is that what Mom told you?”
Surprised by the scowl on her face, I could only manage a nod.
“That’s not what happened,” Rose said, sitting up straight. “Not even close.”
“So tell me what did.” Reaching out, I lightly brushed her knuckles with the tips of my fingers. I’d meant to take her hand in mine as a comforting gesture but chickened out at the last second.
Rose deflated in her seat, as if my fleeting touch had punctured her escalating anger. “It’s complicated.”
I expected her to say more, to start confessing excuses, but she averted her gaze instead.
