“And if he doesn’t want to be involved, then you raise this baby the way you’re raising Ella. With love and strength. And you’ll be fine, because you’re Georgia Halford and you’ve never needed anyone to complete you.”
I look at Ella, playing with her blocks, completely oblivious to how her world is about to change. A little sister or brother. Another sibling she’ll have to share me with.
And I think about Calvin. The way he was with Ella by the end. Patient, playful, genuinely caring. Could he be that way with this baby? Could he step up, learn, become the father this child deserves? Or would he let me down like everyone else has?
“I don’t know if I can do this,” I whisper. “Tell him. Face him. Risk everything all over again.”
“You don’t have to decide today. You have time.”
But even as she says it, I know that’s not true. Every day I wait is another day of lying by omission. Another day of keeping a secret that will only get harder to share. Sooner or later, I’m going to have to tell him, whether I’m ready or not.
I rest my hand on my stomach, where a tiny cluster of cells is growing into a person. Half me, half the man I fell in love with in the desert. The man who learned how to care for my daughter but couldn’t learn how to choose me.
“What am I going to do?” I ask no one in particular.
Ella toddles over and climbs into my lap, sensing something is wrong. “Mama sad?”
“No, baby. Mama’s just… surprised. But it’s okay. Everything’s going to be okay.”
I hold her close and hope I’m telling the truth.
CHAPTER 26
CALVIN
It’s a little past ten in the morning when Ollie buzzes my office.
“Mr. Aarons? There’s a… Lois Henderson here to see you? She doesn’t have an appointment, but she says it’s important.”
I look up from the financial reports I’ve been staring at without actually reading. “Lois? Georgia’s neighbor?”
“She says she knows Dr. Halford, yes.”
My heart does something complicated in my chest. “Send her in.”
I stand as the door opens, and Lois walks in looking exactly as I remember—a little bent but spry, with sharp eyes that seem to see right through people’s defenses. She’s wearing a sensible coat and carrying a large purse, and she looks around my office with frank curiosity.
“Well,” she says, “this is quite the setup you have here. Very impressive.”
“Lois. This is… unexpected.” I gesture to the chair across from my desk. “Please, sit. Can I get you anything? Coffee? Water?”
“I’m fine, thank you.” She settles into the chair, studying me with an expression I can’t read. “You look terrible, by the way. When’s the last time you slept properly?”
The bluntness startles a laugh out of me. “It’s good to see you too. You’re looking well. Fully recovered?”
“Oh, yes. That virus knocked me flat, but I’m back to my old self now.” She sets her purse on her lap. “I’m in the city with some girlfriends. Girls’ trip, though at our age we probably shouldn’t call ourselves girls anymore. We’re seeing the sights. Times Square, the Statue of Liberty, a Broadway show tomorrow.”
“That sounds lovely.”
“It is. But tourism isn’t the only reason I’m here.”
I sink back into my chair, suddenly wary. “No?”
“No. I’m here to talk to you about Georgia.”
The name makes me freeze. I’ve been so carefully not thinking about her, not saying her name, not letting myself remember. And now here’s Lois, saying it like it’s simple, like it doesn’t tear something open in my chest.
“How is she?” The question escapes before I can stop it.
