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“What do you want, Jimmy?” I asked and straightened my spine. The old familiar feelings crept their way back in and I was preparing myself for defense. It was the only way to be around him. My chest started to tighten as my heart rate quickened, beads of sweat began to form on my upper lip as I clenched my fists to my sides. He still had the bottle to his lips and drinking so he didn’t respond. “What. Do. You. Want?” I repeated as my temper began to seethe.
“I wanna know if you’re done with this hissy?”
“Hissy?” I stormed around in a circle. “Jimmy, you choked me until I almost passed out! I would say this is more than a hissy fit.” Grabbing the cast iron skillet that night as he was dragging me down to the floor and cracking him over the head with it saved my life.
“That’s what we do, Bananie,” he shrugged and stepped forward on wobbly legs. “Don’t mean I don’t love you.” His statement made my skin crawl. I didn’t want to be loved like that.
“You need to go.” I walked to the door and was about to pull it open.
“You don’t want me ‘cause of him?” Jimmy growled into my ear as he trapped me against the door with his body, my back against his chest.
“What?” I sputtered. “What are you talking about?”
“Him. The motherfucker with the Camaro.”
Hal? Was he talking about Hal?
“H-how did you…?”
“Oh, baby, I’ve been watching you for a while. Even when you were back at that shit hole motel.” I tried to push him away but my strength was no match for him as he pressed me harder against the door. “Oh, and by the way, I was low on funds. I hope you don’t mind that I borrowed some cash.”
Jimmy stole my money from the motel? He was the one who taught me to keep the money in the air vent. Of course, he found it with no problem just like he did the coffee can. I hated that he knew my habits so well. Fury raged through me, from the tips of my toes to the top of my head and I began to thrash my arms around.
“You rotten son of a bitch!” I screeched and tried to break free so I could turn around and slug him in the face. “I had almost two grand in there! I needed that money for the kids!”
He managed to keep me restrained although I could tell he was beginning to struggle. Maybe the bourbon was catching up to him.
“You’re fuckin’ him, aren’t you?” He hissed as he flipped me around to face him still keeping a tight grasp on my wrists and trapping them between our bodies. “Were you plannin’ to fuck him tonight?”
His eyes were ice cold. I’ve never seen him like this, of all the shit we’d fought about, it never involved him actually believing I’d messed around with someone else. He might have said it to get a reaction, but even he never really believed it. I knew we were crossing over into bad territory and I racked my brain to figure out how to diffuse the moment, so I went with passiveness.
“Jimmy, let’s calm down.”
“Just answer my question, Annie. Have you been fucking him?”
“No, I’m not fuckin’ him.” Which was true. I placed my hands against his chest and pushed but it was impossible for me to budge him.
“I want you to come home.” He murmured, his hazel eyes were a muddy brown as his eyelids began to droop.
“Home? What home, Jimmy? A cheap motel room? That’s no home.”
“We’ll get a house.” I rolled my eyes and looked away.
“I’ve heard that before.”
“I mean it.” He cooed, then hiccupped.
“Heard that before, too.” His half-lidded and bloodshot eyes grew wide with anger.
“How about this, you ain’t got a choice. Those are my kids and I got rights.” He shouted into my face and I closed my eyes as the stench of his breath blew in my face. “You want those kids, you gotta be with me, too. Packaged deal, baby. Take it or leave it.”
I knew better than to doubt him. He would take off with the boys and no court could do anything about it. Jimmy knew the type of people who would make it so he would never be found, not if he didn’t want to be.
I had to do something. There was no way I’d be leaving with him and I knew for damn sure my boys wouldn’t be either, so I hatched a desperate plan.
“Okay.” I said and wriggled a hand up to rest it on his cheek. “Okay, we’ll go with you.”
“Really?” He asked, shocked at first, then his expression turned to satisfaction. “Damn right you will. You need me and you know it. Get packed up.” He stepped back. When I moved past him, he swatted my behind with a droopy grin. The half-full bottle of bourbon was dangling from his fingers and I saw my chance.
