Amelia stood back, watching the warmth with which the McGowans interacted. She longed for that warmth, but she knew that she couldn’t indulge it. Not now. Maybe not ever. Watching as Lucas helped Flora into the carriage, Amelia crossed her arms over her chest in an attempt to replicate that affection.
A few minutes later, the carriage pulled away, flanked by guards from Clan McGowan. Amelia stood there the longest, staring at the open gate, even after everyone else had returned to the castle to carry on their duties. She hadn’t realized just how quiet the keep was before the McGowans had arrived.
I cannae just stand here all day.
Forcing herself to move, she turned around and walked back into the castle. Inside was suspiciously still. It was as if the staff that worked within the walls hadn’t been informed of the upcoming hunt.
It may be likely that Darragh gave them the day to rest. That doesnae make this quiet any more welcomin’, though.
She shook her head, frowning. There was no reason for him to be in her thoughts, especially not so casually, but he had been on her mind incessantly, especially after that night in the solar. And then that heated moment in the courtyard that haunted her dreams…
As her footsteps echoed off the walls of the corridor, she wondered which day would be her last here. Would she know? And if she did, would Darragh be able to tell her plans if he looked at her? He was becoming irritatingly perceptive.
“Ye’re lookin’ well, Miss Amelia,” a maid said, and though her voice was soft, Amelia nearly jumped out of her skin.
“Thank ye,” Amelia said, slowing her step but not stopping. She chastised herself for not paying attention to her surroundings, for getting too comfortable even when she knew this place was not for her much longer. “I’m feelin’ well.”
She didn’t stick around long enough for the woman to respond. Guilt ate at her insides as it had been for the last several days. It felt wrong, disingenuous, to be moving around Darragh’s castle so comfortably. She wasn’t going to give him a chance to prove his declarations about keeping her safe.
I cannae believe him. Nae when me mind gets fuzzy every time I think about those kisses we shared. Me judgment’s clouded. I shouldnae want him near.
Amelia was nearly to her room when she spotted Jinny. The maid was fussing over something, but the second she heard footsteps approaching, she straightened up. A smile grew over her face when she saw Amelia.
“Ach, I was just wonderin’ where ye were,” she said, tucking the handkerchief she’d been mending into her apron. “I imagine ye’ll want to rest now that our guests are on their way home. Ye really dinnae take much time to yerself when they were here.”
“Nay, I daenae wish to rest,” Amelia contradicted, nearly laughing at the exaggerated surprise on her maid’s face. “I suppose I’m still buzzin’ with energy. I was hopin’ ye could keep me busy.”
She gave Jinny a polite smile, bolstered by the fact that her reasoning wasn’t entirely a lie. The thoughts that always seemed to find a way to drift back to Darragh were making her restless. A distraction would do her a world of good, and perhaps when she finished, she might actually be able to rest.
“I suppose…” Jinny said, recovering from the unexpected request slowly. She rested her index finger on her chin, tapping the pad against her lip thoughtfully. “… I could find somethin’ for ye to assist me with.”
“Perfect,” Amelia replied, looking at the maid expectantly. “That would be wonderful, Jinny.”
“Right then,” Jinny murmured after a moment. She scanned the corridor as if an answer for what to do with Amelia would jump out of the walls. “Well, ye’ve done most of the inventoryin’ tasks on yer own. The kitchens have more than enough food prepared to feed us for the next two days. Theywouldappreciate help in the courtyard, but I’m nae sendin’ a lass out there.”
“Surely there’s somethin’ that I can assist with,” Amelia urged. “Perhaps I could reorganize the linen stores again.”
“Nay, the old linen is already on the line,” Jinny said, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “And it willnae be dry until this afternoon. I do suppose there will be a delivery of fresh linens that ye can oversee, but I’m nae sure when it will arrive.”
Disappointment washed over Amelia, and she knew she did a poor job of hiding it. As soon as Jinny caught the frustrated expression on Amelia’s face, she huffed. Then, her expression brightened.
“Ach, I ken!” she said, taking hold of Amelia’s elbow and urging her forward. “Ye can go through the clan’s ledgers. Laird Fraserwill be renegotiatin’ trades soon, and it will be a great help for him to ken the numbers are correct.”
“That’s perfect,” Amelia said, letting herself be dragged down the hallway toward the library. “Numbers make more sense than anythin’ else.”
* * *
Darragh stepped out of his study, needing to give himself a break from the logistics of preparing for the fox hunt. It was always an event he looked forward to, but this year he had so much else taking up space in his mind that it felt more like a chore than a social event. Worse still was that his hands were tied in regard to Laird Mackenzie, who was the most pressing issue, while he waited for information.
And dwellin’ on it isnae a good use of me energy.
“Me Laird,” a servant said as he passed, standing at full attention, “the new linens are bein’ delivered as we speak.”
“Excellent,” Darragh grunted, though the linens had slipped his mind. Mrs. Rowan was the one who’d written the order. “And do ye ken who’s overseein’ the delivery?”
“I daenae, Me Laird,” he said, bowing his head.
Darragh dismissed the servant with a wave of his hand. He’d get the information about the delivery at the end of the day. He had intended to clear his mind, not find additional tasks.
