Kitty and Lydia glanced between them, while Mrs Jenkinson said, “I am quite satisfied with my present duties. It may take time, but success is assured.”
Anne understood the subtle message that it was not entirely necessary to acquaint the younger Bennet sisters with all the particulars. Mrs Jenkinson and Anne had used Christian names for years, so the former companion’s answer showed that she would defer to Anne’s judgement, yet was not in the least unhappy with how matters had fallen out. She would explain it all to Lizzy later and speak with Mrs Jenkinson after. For the moment, all seemed well.
Elizabeth said, “I am happy to see you, Mrs Jenkinson. I hope you have a strong constitution with these two.”
Kitty and Lydia giggled.
Mrs Jenkinson said, “Strong as an ox. These two would not even make it into the bottom quartile.”
Lydia looked perplexed, so Elizabeth explained carefully.
“A quartile is a quarter of an ordered set, Lydia. Suppose you take 100 girls and arrange them from naughtiest to nicest. The 25 naughtiest would form the bottom quartile, while the 25 nicest would form the top.”
Not to be outdone, Lydia replied, “Oh, we shall fall into the top quartile when you arrange us by angelicness—is that even a word?”
Everyone was laughing when Bennet poked his head in and asked how everyone was getting along.
Lydia said, “We are studying mathematics and deportment, Papa.”
Her father scratched his head, concluded—probably correctly—that he would never understand women, and retreated to his library, where arguments were rare since most of his opponents had been dead for centuries.
The Null Assertion
“Lizzy, you seem to have completely upset the natural order of things, based on the well-known Natural Equations of Family Dynamics,” Bennet said when Elizabeth visited him in his cave.
She had given much thought to how she would deal with her father after the debacle of the previous few months. On the one hand, it was obvious her parents had done their duty very poorly. On the other hand, matters seemed to be working out as they should either because of or in spite of their upbringing. The first breeze before a thought storm stirred, so she would think about it later. For the moment, it was time to trim her sails, talk to the man, and see what happened.
“Which rule?”
“The generally accepted rule stipulates that as daughters are married, the number of females in the household decreases, thus skewing the male-to-female ratio gradually towards unity. I have one daughter married, yet 7 women under my roof, anincreaseof 16%. I suppose I will find out if it is linear, additive, or conditional when Jane’s gentleman finally works up his nerve—if it happens at all, that is.”
“Theotherwell-known rule is that the total level of whingeing in a household should decrease as daughters wed, and yet I see a dramaticincreasehere in my first foray back into family discourse.”
“Touché, my dear. It would seem there is little point in battles of wits with you.”
“Indeed!”
Elizabeth was modestly satisfied with the exchange. She had been so on edge with her father before her visit to Mary that she feared it would be a permanent condition. She was still notpreciselyhappywith the man, but she wasless unhappy, which was sufficient for the moment.
“One thing interests me. Is Mrs Jenkinson Miss de Bourgh’s companion or an unexpected governess for my two youngest?”
“Yes.”
“You realise that was an either-or question.”
“You assume the choices are mutually exclusive. I did not take Mrs Jenkinson’s measure at Rosings, mostly due to pride and misplaced faith in first impressions. I now believe she could fulfil both roles and even bring Mama into line if she should so choose.”
Bennet chuckled. “I would pay good money to see that.”
If he would spend money to see her mother improved, why would he not spend time and effort in the same pursuit?
There was little profit in that line of discourse, so she abandoned it.
“Mama has her own new nemesis, so Mrs Jenkinson will be spared that duty, but that brings up a question. I confess, when I absconded with Anne, I did not give a single thought to her companion, much to my discredit. I have apologised to her, but she is not receptive, asserting no wrong was committed. I wonder, though. I assume Lady Catherine is paying her wages and perhaps sending you a stipend for her upkeep. Is that true, or will I need to write to her to straighten it out?”
“So, you are in charge of Lady Catherine’s financial affairs, are you?”
“Much has happened that you are unaware of, but, no, I am in no way in charge of Lady Catherine.”
