“So, she just decided, arbitrarily, unilaterally, and abruptly, to send her daughter here in exchange for Charlotte Lucas, eh? Her knowledge of Hertfordshire society must be lacking, sinceshe could not even work out that Miss Lucas does not live at Longbourn.”
Whether she liked the teasing or hated it, she could not tell, but she would say as much as she could anyway. “That was my idea, so you may blame me if you like. The story is long, complicated, and private.”
Bennet leaned back and eyed his most unusual child speculatively.
“Do not concern yourself. I have no need to delve into your private affairs, let alone those of two ladies so wholly unconnected. I imagine I should set your mind at rest vis-à-vis Mrs Jenkinson’s expense. Lady Catherine may well have taken care of the matter, but even if she had not, your Mr Darcy spoke with Mrs Jenkinson to ensure she was satisfied. He offered her a pension and a cottage at Pemberley if she liked, and she apparently told him she would be willing to start practising for death when she got closer to the actual event. He seemed satisfied with her answer.”
She did not gasp, since the smirk on her father’s face revealed his aim.
Still, her answer came sharp as she fought for composure. “He is notmy Mr Darcy—and what was he even doing here?”
Her father leaned back, searching for the right words. “You have only given half of the traditional answer. I will trouble you for the missing assertion.”
“Missing assertion? Perhaps we should switch to English, as that sentence is too convoluted for evenmeto follow.”
“You know full well what I mean.For months, everyone felt the need to tease you about him, from that firstnot handsome enoughcomment at that blasted assembly. Your response was invariably,‘He is not my Mr Darcy,and never will be.’ You might have varied it by addingmost assuredlyorcertainly, oroccasionally by imitating his low voice and haughty manner; but the basic syntax was unvarying, aside from the extra adverbs. You have curiously cut the reply in half.”
“Perhaps I grow tired of the repetition, since it has all been said so many times before, with no measurable effect.”
“Or perhaps you are not so confident in the second assertion? I know you, my girl. You are a terrible liar, but an excellent prevaricator. Let us save ourselves some tedious attempts to pry it out of you. Simply tell me that‘he never will be’,and I will accept your word at face value.”
Elizabeth stared at him, anger and frustration knotting together for reasons she could not name, while her father cleaned the ash from his pipe.
Elizabeth sighed. “I cannot.”
Her father paused his cleaning and nodded. “Well, that is good. The man improves on acquaintance, and I would hate to see your general mulishness extend to condemning him forever over a month’s worth of manners no worse than mine. He may not be yours now, but it is not beyond the realm of possibility.”
Elizabeth nodded, but her father continued. “Tell me, Elizabeth. Do you and Mr Darcy have anunderstandingof any kind?”
Elizabeth blushed slightly, but answered tolerably well. “We most emphatically do not. Does that satisfy your thirst for adverbs?”
“Quite!”
“We have a mutually understood future confluence of schedules, but that is all.”
“English, if you please.”
“We mutually understand we will both be present at the monthly assembly in October. I do not expect to see him before.”
Her father chuckled. “So, youarehandsome enough to tempt him?”
“Apparently! Now, if you please, might you answer my second question, or did you think I would forget?”
Bennet chuckled and continued cleaning his pipe.
“He was in Hertfordshire ostensibly on business, though whether it was urgent is a matter of conjecture. He was supposedly here to look after Netherfield as a favour to that young pup whose name is no longer spoken. He looked in on the tenants, ordered repairs, and oversaw the replacement of some of the servants.”
Despite her general annoyance with her father—and to be honest, Mr Darcy—she asked, “You used bothostensiblyandsupposedlyin one breath. Are you implying that Mr Darcy came for some other purpose?”
Having finally cleaned his pipe to his satisfaction, her father reached for a pouch of tobacco and replied tangentially.
“Did I ever tell you about my boyhood friends, Evan and Cecil?”
“Is this a distraction, or a way to answer the question?”
“While I may not be the best parent, would you at least credit me with enough understanding of my daughter to see the folly of distraction? You are like a dog with a bone. No amount of distraction has worked in the past, so you may assume I know the futility of such an endeavour. Furthermore, since we both know it will not work, there is little amusement in the attempt.”
“Very well, Father. Tell me about the notable Evan and Cecil.”
