Lying there in the dim living room, I stared at the ceiling.
I loved him. That part was clear. I wanted him. Also clear. But love wasn’t the only thing that mattered.
I needed to know I wouldn’t disappear.
I needed to know I could stand beside him, not behind him, not underneath him, not absorbed into his world.
And I needed to know that if I ever did fall, it wouldn’t be back into a van alone, pretending it was freedom.
38
BELLE
Iwoke up the next day and had a shift at the coffee shop. I was ready to go home and fix things with Raph. I hadn’t figured out the logistics, but that beast had won my heart.
The rain started before my shift and never let up. By four, it was a steady curtain against the windows of the coffee shop, turning the world outside into blurred headlights and gray sidewalks. By six, it had deepened into something heavier with wind pushing it sideways, gutters choking, thunder rumbling in low warning.
It matched the inside of my head a little too well.
I moved through my shift on autopilot. Steam milk. Wipe counters. Smile at regulars. Nod at James when he asked if I was good.
“I’m good,” I’d said.
I wasn’t.
But I had decided something the night before.
After my shift, I was going to find Beast.
At the end of my shift, I untied my apron, hung it on its hook, and grabbed my bag.
The rain pounded the glass like it was trying to get in.
“Text me when you get home,” James called.
“I will.”
I stepped toward the door and pulled it open just enough to feel the spray of water hit my legs. Fantastic. As I adjusted my hood and ran to my van.
When I got there, my phone rang. It was Tripp. My stomach dropped so fast I nearly dropped it. I considered ignoring it. But after the last twenty-four hours, that felt reckless.
I answered. “What?”
He was breathing heavily. “We need to talk,” he said.
“I’m off the clock.”
“Now, Belle.”
Something in his tone made my skin prickle.
“I’m not coming to your office in a storm,” I replied.
A pause.
Then I heard it. A voice in the background. A voice I knew all too well.
“Belle? Kiddo? You there?”
