Her eyes meet mine with a fierce determination. “I didn’t get to choose to keep Diana. But if I’d had the choice, I’d have chosen love. Even living in Rosehill, knowing the pain it would cause me.”
She sets the photo down and takes both of my hands into hers. “Love isn’t safe, and it isn’t guaranteed forever. But it iseverything.”
I swallow, blinking away tears. “Your life doesn’t seem so bad. I’ve always looked up to you, you know.”
“Oh, honey. I’ve got my art and that stubborn old garden. And I loved my students.” Her fingers tighten around mine. “But it’s quiet around here.”
There’s a sadness in her voice that makes me ache for her.
“I’ve lived a lonely life. And sometimes I wonder what it would’ve been like if I’d fought harder for us.” She looks back down at the picture. “Don’t spend decades loving someone from afar, Iris. Don’t let fear steal your happiness.”
Her words settle over me as I squeeze her hands back. “Thank you for telling me about Diana.”
She lets out a long breath that seems to carry years of heartbreak with it. “That boy of yours. Nate,” she says, putting the photo away. “He’s a good man.”
I blink, caught off guard. “You think so?”
“I know so. He’s young. He’ll make mistakes. But he’s got a good heart.”
I press my lips together, looking down. “He deserves better.”
“He deserves love,” she corrects. “But so do you. If you’re leaving because it’s what’s right foryou, then do it. Leave and never look back. But don’t run because you’re scared.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Then don’t.”
That night, sleep doesn’t come easily, Ms. Price’s words circling through my head until they’re stitched into my brain.
Don’t let fear steal your happiness.
He deserves love, but so do you.
I roll onto my side, yanking the blanket tighter around me. I can still see the way her eyes turned glassy when she talked about Diana. The way she said she was lonely.She’s lived an entire life, and nothing ever filled the space she left behind.
If I were to leave, I would be doing the same thing to Nate.
Because he loves me, no matter what the rest of this town thinks. He loves me, and he wants me to stay,and if that doesn’t matter, what does?
Ms. Price seemed to think it was that simple, and she’s the smartest person I know.
I can’t help but wonder if maybe I’ve been going about it all wrong. If maybe belonging isn’t about whether or not the town accepts me, but more about choosing to stay anyway. Making a place for myself here with my friends and my family, and if someone doesn’t like it?
That’stheirproblem, not mine.
The thought settles, warm and terrifying all at once, at the enormity of how much I’ve messed things up.
But tomorrow is a new day.
I’ll talk to Nate.
I’ll set things right.
Eventually, exhaustion wins out.
I’m drifting somewhere between sleep and the thought of what I’m going to say to Nate tomorrow, when a sound snaps me awake.
The front door.
