She took his arm, gripping him. “There’s nothing wrong with you. Okay? You’re allowed to want these things and you should be able to have them. I want you to have them. The part that’s wrong is me.”
He released a bitter laugh. “Okay, so we’re doing the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ thing.”
She sighed. “I’m never going to get married.”
“What? Why?”
“To be honest, I don’t want to ever find myself stuck in a situation like my parents. Their love died and now they only hate each other. Before you came along, I didn’t want to be in a relationship, fake or real. And I knew better than to start anything with you, but you’re just that likable. I went against myself. But I don’t want to keep leading you on, making you think that I’m going to eventually give you what you want, when I can’t.”
This whole conversation was bonkers to Mason. “Natalie, honey, we’ve only been together for a few weeks. All this stuff you’re worried about, if it were to happen, is way down the line. I’m not rushing anything. I’m not expecting to become a husband next month. I just want to be with you.”
“But why should you waste your time on me?”
He snapped because it was clear he wasn’t winning. “Because I love—”
“No, you don’t!”
Mason brushed a hand across her cheek, hoping this would be a link, allowing him to hold on to her. “I do. With all my heart, Natalie Gonzalez-Torres. And if you don’t ever want to get married, okay, fine. But let me be with you. Please.”
Natalie wiped a tear away. “You don’t love me. You can’t. You may feel something, but it’s not love, Mason. Whatever you think it is, it isn’t real.”
“You’re going to tell me what I feel?”
“You said it yourself. We’ve only known each other for a few weeks. No one actually loves someone that fast, and, even if they do, there’s no way it’s going to last. Do you think your parents are still madly, deeply in love? Do you ever notice them showing affection—a hug, a kiss, anything with each other? Today when we were watching a movie, they didn’t even sit next to each other. I’m telling you, everything fades. And all you end up with is cold, drab January. I’m not going to be stuck, Mase.”
“Come on, Nat—”
“These are my problems, not yours. I don’t want you to stop believing. I like that you still believe. I don’t want you to settle for the horse blanket on the ground. You deserve so much more.”
Mason couldn’t see anything beyond his own heart crushing into a pile of dust.
Natalie gave him one long look, her own eyes glistening with unspent tears. “It seems like you forgot after all.” She pointed to herself. “Villain.”
