Chapter Twenty-Three
When someone tappedon her office door, Natalie did her best to smother her heavy breaths and delicately dry the corners of her eyes with some commercial toilet paper from the supply closet. It wasn’t the best choice as the paper wasn’t the softest. Her skin was becoming raw. “Yeah?” she called, hoping whatever it was wouldn’t require her to leave her office.
“It’s Mia.”
Dammit. She cleared her throat, hoping it would be enough to make her sound in total control and not on the verge of losing it. “I’m really busy. Can I just talk to you later?”
“What are you busy with?”
Double damn. She struggled inventing something believable, which shouldn’t be difficult to do, but it was as if she suddenly forgot what her job entailed. “I’m doing payroll.”
“Let’s stop beating around the bush. I was in Ross’s office, and I could hear you crying.”
It was debatable how many tears had to be present to warrant the definition of crying. She swung open the door anyway. “I’m fine. I wasn’t crying.”
Her friend’s expression revealed horror. “God. What happened to your eyes?”
“What?” She touched the corners, trying not to flinch at the sensitive pain from it. “Allergies.”
Mia pushed her way inside and shut the door, which only served to remind Natalie of the one time Mason had done the same thing. She reached for the toilet paper again.
“Natalie. Stop. You haven’t been answering my texts. I’m not going to let you just shut yourself off from everything.”
“I’m not. I’m at work, okay? I can’t just drop everything when you text.”
“I texted last night.”
Last night, she drove home from Mason’s parents’ house and proceeded to cry her eyes out. The last thing she was worried about were text messages.
Mia looked at her with such sympathy while rubbing her arm, she couldn’t hold it together anymore. The tears sprang forth and she leaned into her friend who held her close.
“Talk to me.”
“I…ended…things…with…him.” Each word was a struggle as she sobbed.
“Okay. You want to tell me why? It seemed like things were going great and you really liked him.”
“I do really like him.”
“Then why did you end things?”
“You already know there’s no point.”
“Do I know that? You may say it, but it doesn’t mean that I’ve accepted it.”
“You know I can’t do relationships and I’m never going to get married so…” She hiccupped and should be embarrassed about all the snot soaking into Mia’s shoulder, but, at the moment, she didn’t care.
“You’re doing this to yourself. I know you joke around and call yourself a villain but the only one you’re constantly punishing is yourself. You’re your own worst enemy. You don’t have to do this. You can take a breath and just be with Mason. Stop jumping ahead to the very worst possibilities.”
“B-but if I get sucked into this even more and I end up like my parents, it’s going to hurt worse. Mason hating me is going to make me cry.”
Mia pulled away, studying her as she wiped tears from her cheek. “Nat, you’re already crying. I understand you’re scared. I know this can be terrifying but…you’re already stuck, both by a past that you can’t change and a future you can’t predict. Sometimes all we have is right here in the present and you have to take advantage of what you’ve got. Regrets are made of days where we had a chance of doing something but chose not to.”
“It was just so much easier when I didn’t have to worry about this, when I could just go to Tahoe and do whatever.”
Mia’s brows drew together, her mouth setting in a line. “Easier for who? Certainly not easier for me. I hate those trips.”
“What?” She was taken aback as her friend had always been nothing but supportive. Had she been missing something the whole time?
